Sufis, God, Love, Happiness and a Moron

1. If I love thee
If I love thee, my love
Do not take me for granted,

Though I will not withdraw
What I have given,
Is that reason to be
So callous with me?

Is that reason to call
Unto me only when
It pleases thee?

Call on me in the
Break of day,
In the stillness
Of thy lonely nights,
Call on me in
Your heartbreak,
When all is bleak,
And without light,
Call on me
When thou are wrong,
Call on me when
Thou are right,
Call on me,
And to me,
Never be shy,
For I shall never
Be deaf to thee
Nor answer thy plea,
With the question, "Why?".

When my servant remembers me,
I do not question him,
It is only when he is forgetful,
That I seek to wake him
From his slumber and
Troubled dream.

............................................

From the chapter entitled 'Muhammad, My Only Other'

This is how I often picture God. The Loving, The Most Compassionate and Most Merciful. My God may be the Most Jealous in his love for his creation, but in His action, He seems the one Most Patient with his sinful servants. I know some Sufi lore depicts Him as an almost obsessive lover. A God who will not countenance you deviating for a nanosecond in your love and devotion to the Only He. I think otherwise. But that is normal, because after all, I am a rabid sinner. The antithesis of a Sufi.

Anyways, this is my Lord to me. - He doesn’t want to butt into my life 24/7. He doesn’t want to impose some divine intervention in all cases. He doesn’t want to be breathing down my neck, constantly remonstrating, “Don’t do this! Don’t do that! Don’t eat that! Stay away from that, she is trouble, boy!” My Lord isn’t like that at all.

My Lord is happy to see me live and celebrate this life, with as much gusto as my 40 years old body can generate. He is happy to see me rejoice in the company of kind and beautiful people, to bask in the glory and love of His Prophet. He wants me to enjoy an ice-cream, and say, “Thank you, God! You make the bestest chocolate cone ever!” . I would like to think so because, you see, I want my God to be happy.

But sometimes (often, really), I make mistakes. I would say a stupid thing (eg "Yes, your thighs do look a little big in that dress") and do an even dumber thing (eg maintaining that I am right). In that circumstance, I don’t want my God to just let me be. To continue to be lost, alone and adrift in my folly. Oh no. Whether it is a bolt of lightning from the sky or a tear from a lover’s eye, I want Him to warn me that I did wrong. And to guide my path back to Him, to happiness.

I may be a moron, but my Lord is the Lord Most Joyous and Most Caring. And he for one, won’t let me continue in my abject moronitude. And GOD KNOWS I have tried.

Hehehe.

Have a superb Saturday, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa.