THE JOURNEY & THE HOMECOMING.... so good... so God

The Beginning of Your Homecoming

That thing that makes you think...

You are not wrong

To think that way.

That thing that makes you feel...

You are not wrong

To feel that way.

When doubt and alarm make you question

Your men and women garbed in religion...

You are not wrong.

Come here, for here is where you belong...

The religion of love is

The religion of your conscience,

The religion of your compassion,

The religion of your science.

For God has never left you,

It is for you to find you.

And your journey

Begins

Here.

And your homecoming

Begins

Here.

And all meaning worth

Knowing... it all

Begins

Here. 

..................

Like you, I was disturbed by my religion, Islam. But later, I am to discover that Islam is not as how I thought Islam was. Islam is not that deranged, insular, bigoted, materialistic, xenophobic, irrational belief that it is portrayed to be, not just by the non-Muslims, but perhaps more sadly, by us Muslims.

Like you, I found it difficult to console my conscience with some aspects of my religion. But later, I am to discover that things are often not as how they seem to be. And that it serves the intentions of some people that Islam is practised and portrayed in a way that is unconscionable, and lacking in empathy. Now, it appears to me that Islam is also the religion and the path of empathy. Empathy not just for our fellow Muslims... but for all humans and djinns, for all created things, living and sentient or otherwise. Thus it is revealed, that Islam is the natural way of the Universe. Not a pebble in the sea, not a star in the furthest cosmos is forgotten in the faith and the perfected way of Muhammad Habibullah (saws).

Like you, I am lost. And like you, I continue my wandering in this world, with tentative nervous steps. For this world is not for us. We seek the Divine Presence, and it is to this, that all Masters of the Path calls on us. 

So you see, like you, I too have not found what I am looking for... but there is a beautiful scent coming down this road we have been guided to, we can hear brief incantations of heavenly music, and sense a light upon light too beautiful and brilliant for careless human words to describe. But try we must.

... ya Ahad ... ya Samad ... Solli ala Muhammad...

Have a beautiful Sunday, sunshine. We are on this journey together, and alhamdulillah... we pray and hope that our homecoming has, in truth, begun. Because even now, it already feels so good... So God.

- notrumi, 21st day of April, 2014

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

THE COMPLAINING ONE - The Ramadan Story, Part 3

There too, Allah Verily Goes

Give Him a moment in your day,

And Allah will give you an eternity,

Give Him a smile in your day,

And Allah will give you something worth smiling for,

Give Him an entry in your day,

And Allah will give you a thousand doors,

Give Him a word in your day,

And Allah will give you a chamber of echoes,

For wherever His servant goes,

There too, step by step, word by word,

With every sigh of contentment,

Allah verily goes.

For is He not 
Very best of company,
The very best of hosts?

...................................

It is coming into the third morning of Ramadan, and I would like to make a confession here.

I wish I was one of those who can submit to illness with a smile in his heart and faith in his bosom, whatever may happen. Instead, if I feel hurt, I will grimace and maybe even emit a pitiful groan. If I am in pain, I do not hide my pain. Instead I shamelessly parade my pain in front of my Lord... "Oh God, I am hurting here... real baaad!" I bitch, gripe, moan, complain and register my list of dissatisfaction with the Almighty, wherever and whenever it happens.

Physical pain has a way of making us forget temporarily, our blessings. And through the noise and litany of grievances, I guess there must be some good here. Even in this illness(es) that is affecting my Ramadan.

My only prayer to the Almighty (and I know that He is aware of this) is this...

4. Too good a disguise

Lord! Oh Lordly, Lordly Lord!

You say that in all hardship and trials

There lies a silver lining.

A blessing in disguise.

But please.

Don’t make the disguise so good

That I cannot finally see through it. 

............................

Patience is often a molehill. A hillock or sometimes
a mighty mountain to climb.

Have a lovely healthy day, sunshine. Have a good one for me.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Remember, you are only a man - The Triumphalism of Man vs The Triumphalism of the Conscience

The Roman Triumph 

When a Roman general achieves 

Great success in the field of battle

He is awarded a Triumph,

A public parade of his soldiers and himself

Through the streets of Rome,

With their prisoners, slaves and booties of war.

A slave boy would stand behind him on the chariot

Holding aloft above his head the laurel wreath,

And whispering into his ears these words of caution,

"Remember, you are only a man..."

...............................

See. Even those ancient Romans understood well the dangers of over-weening pride and hubris. It would have paid Mankind well if we remember and follow the advice of the slave. Because when we take stock of the recent century of human 'progress' there has been many times when a little humility and humanity would have gone a long way in avoiding the pitfalls and cons of our less than perfect achievements. After all...

Triumphalism of Man

The Triumphalism of Architecture

Herald in the era of concrete monstrosity,

The Triumphalism of Brotherly Fraternity

Herald in the era of tyranny by the many,

The Triumphalism of Medicine

Herald in the era of over-drugged citizenry,

The Triumphalism of Psychology

Herald in the era of newer types of insanity,

The Triumphalism of Physics

Herald in the era of the Atom Bomb,

The Triumphalism of Modern Technology

Herald in the era of remote murders and killings,

The Triumphalism of Agro and Bio sciences

Herald in the era of global pharma-food companies,

The Triumphalism of Capitalism

Herald in the era of ostentatious consumerism,

The Triumphalism of Political Clerics

Herald in the era of the 'Islamic' republics,

The Triumphalism of Finance and the Economics

Herald in the era of thieves, blackmailers and sociopaths

Dressed in well-tailored suits and good intentions.

And lastly, the Triumphalism of the Information Age

Herald in the era of ignorance, anarchy and hate, 

.................................

I am not against progress, but like all things in this world, anything can be exaggerated and abused, until its end product becomes a corruption of the original intent.

We all have a slave, just like the mighty Roman commanders, standing behind us, ever whispering into our soul... 'Remember, you are only a man...' It is called our conscience. 

And it is the best among us, who turns around to the slave, and says... 'No, you stand in front. Where you lead, I shall follow.'

Don't you agree, sunshine?

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

COMMERCE & SPIRITUALITY - Between the enjoyment of consuming, and the happiness of giving and sharing...

Abbot: Mine is made in China. What about yours?
Muslim Dude: Golly! Even my 'little Kaaba' is made in China.

Holy Days and Holy Wastes

Romantic love rules the airwaves,

Anniversaries and Valentine’s Day,

Motherly love rules on Mother’s Day,

Fatherly love rules on Father’s Day,

Friendly love rules on Birthdays,

And thankfully... Godly love is celebrated

On the His Holy Days, 

But every day the love is ruined

By over-commercialization

And exploitation, the message

Lost in a morass of holy waste

And religious haze.

……………….

COMMERCE AND SPIRITUALITY. Actually, even before the Prophethood of Muhammad (pbuh), commerce and religion has always been intertwined. You need only visit the Muslim holy cities of Mecca and Medina, to see pilgrim-tourist businesses thriving along the Masjid Nabawi and the Masjidil Haram. And Jerusalem too, the shared holy city for the Jews, Christians and Muslims. Everywhere you can find faux relics of saints and prophets, the Hand of Fatima, the Turkish Ward against the Evil Eye and all sorts of rosaries, tasbihs, clay and china figurines of the Virgin Mother, Verses of the Quran and Bible framed and sometimes etched on sheep skin, miniature little Kaabas, whirling Mehlevi dervishes and etc. The beauty (or crassness, let’s be honest here) of the spiritual souveniers is only limited by the imagination of the artist or the prolific factories in China, where all these religious bric-a-bracs appear to come from.

Jerusalem, present day. This procession of the Christian Nuns
have been going on for the longest time.

SPECIAL ……… (insert your religious festival here)……. PROMOTION! So I am going to be realistic and not proceed to condemn the commercialization of religious holidays and festivities. But like all things in life… it ought to be done in a measured and sensible level. There was once a time in Malaysia, when the Muslims tend to scorn the commercial exploitation of Christmas – you know, all that glittering Christmas trees, Santas and Santarinas on hire, and the give-your-loved-ones-Xmas-presents-though-you-will-max-your-credit-card kinda promotional ethos of the big super malls of Malaysia (oh yes. We have them aplenty). But now, alas, I do not really see that much difference between the Muslims and Christians. Muslims too can be guilty of unparalleled consumerism during the Eidul Fitri celebrations - New curtains, new sofas, new cellphones, new laptops, new TVs and even new cars sometimes.

Jerusalem, 1915. The last recorded procession of the Ottoman's
Feast for the Prophet Moses. 

A FINE BALANCE. And I shan’t be a party-pooper or Mr. Killjoy. After all, we are not saints. Nor are we Christian, Hindu, Buddhist or Sufi hermits. But I think there must be a fine balance we can strive towards... between self-gratification and philanthropy, between the enjoyment of consuming and the happiness of giving and sharing. 

CONCLUSION. Whether you are a Muslim or Christian (or Jew, Hindu, Punjabi, Wiccan… etc), I think we shall all benefit from focusing more on the giving bit, rather than the consuming bit. And the first 'giving' flavor for the day? - Let us give each other, of whatever race or faith we may be, the benefit of the doubt. The benefit of our tolerance and understanding. The benefit of our compassion and mercy.  And I do not think we need a special day or event to to give voice to such humanity. Not when we are aware that everyday is a blessed day from God... 24 never-to-be-gained-again hours especially created for you and for me.

Don’t you agree, sunshine?

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Love's Natural Course - Self-Reconciliation and Befriending One Self

My Friendship With Me

When I am down, I pretend I am not friends with myself,

Then I find solace in the company of my other friends.

But I have found that the greatest friends

Are those who will refuse to let me

Be at odds with myself,

And who will, with patience

And kindness,

Gently reintroduce me

To myself and let

Love’s natural course

Lead me back to

Friendship

With myself.

Oh, come on! It's nobody else. It's you. Talk to him...

You cannot be angry with yourself forever. You cannot be disappointed with yourself for too long. You cannot just sulk and ignore your own self. At the end, you must face yourself, however angry or disappointed you are. Because after all, you are you and no one else. And no one else can make you contented and happy.

So listen to your friends, and face yourself. Do not be afraid. It can all be forgiven.

Have a conciliatory day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Become a Bridge. Don't Burn the Bridge.

104. What’s Your Name Again?

My name is unimportant

My life is insignificant

Words are all that is left of me.

And even they are on loan,

A bridge to the Great Unknown

To a Liege Who desires to be known.

TWITTERWARS. First there were flaming emails, as human conflict ascends into the internet. Then it became twitter wars, as people fight each other in full view of the world.

MORONS. I can understand that in the spur of anger and frustration, we lose it and we say things we would regret. What is more culpable however is when people actually take the time and trouble to write something nasty in an email, on Facebook or on Twitter. I can easily forgive the sudden impulse of verbal discontent that we sometimes let fly. “Moron!” is my favourite adjectives for inconsiderate drivers. My sainted late mother would let burst an even more earthier condemnation of drivers whom she believed had been severely uncivil… “Makan taik punya orang!” Literally meaning, “Those damn shit-eating people!”.

So we lose our temper, because that is the price of living in a society of imperfect mankind. It just happens. In fact, I would probably lose temper even when alone on a deserted island. No doubt, I would catch my reflection in a secluded pond, before muttering, “You damn fool. Look what happens when you go cheap on the ferry ride…”

WRITING. But writing is different. Writing requires introspection. It demands contemplation of the words and the meaning we intend for the reader. Surely, if you had to sit back to write something, and if you reflect into your inner space, your conscience and your heart, SURELY there must be something good to write, instead of the damning judgment of some other person. Surely, at the end of it all, whatever we write, especially nasty thoughts, will have no good result. Not for you nor for the intended reader…

I write because I like to write about God. And about the beautiful persons that He acquaints Himself with. So I write about the Prophets, the Companions and the Saints. But I also like to write about ordinary people. Because for whatever reason which I cannot imagine, God acquaints with us too. Indeed He seems Most Preoccupied with us.

So write about the good and God, sunshine. Become a bridge. Don't burn the bridge.

Pax Taufiqa

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The Ordinary People Who Make this World an Extraordinarily Better Place to Live in - Saints & our Conscience

3. My Conscience

The cold and solitude

Of my eyes that I spoil and coddle,

The hunger pangs of my heart 

To which I yield little.

A lost sheep, astray from the flock,

A wayward ship, dashed against the rocks.

8. Third Eye

If He created the illusion,

Verily, He created the Third Eye

To pierce all illusions.

If He created the maze,

Verily, He also created the Stars

To guide you home.

And if He created Sin,

Verily, He also created the pangs of conscience

To bring you back,

However far you have roamed.

THE GOOD PEOPLE. I suspect that there are actually a lot of good people out there. I would like to believe, and indeed I do believe that most people tend to be decent and kind, quietly living their lives, trying to earn an honest living and bringing up their children as best they can.

I love such people. For I am not like them, me being a sinner of sorts. I am grateful for the good people living among us sinners. Those who did not dash themselves against the rocks of their egos. Those who did not allow their pride or hubris to misguide them.

US SINNERS. But even for us sinners, there is always a way home. A guide to bring us back into the fold of the good people. A star to guide us home from our wayward travel. In Sufi stories such stars are often in reference to the Companions of the Prophet and the Saints.

ORDINARY BUT SAINTLY. But sometimes the heavenly star that God provides for us are not a Saint per se, but the saintly among us. The anonymous friend, the kind stranger, the loving sister, the ordinary people who make this world an extraordinarily better place to live in. It is they who speak for our own conscience when we ourselves are deaf to it.

When the Saints are not around, it is to them that I owe so much.

Have a lovely day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Bitterness - a short guide

grumble... grumble... grumble

Anger

Sufis (and everyone else really) know that getting angry is bad, but bitterness, that undercurrent of dissatisfaction rippling beneath the surface is also bad, very bad indeed. When you get angry, people know about it. So it is out in the open and can be resolved, one way or the other.

Bitterness

But bitterness, especially for people who are natural actors and talented in hiding their emotions, is a hot burning lava which will consume them from the inside. I do not know what is the quick fix to bitterness. Yes, of course we need to contemplate and reflect on the positives of this life, in our selves and in people around us. And we can also pray very, very hard that God might guide us away from the dark karma consuming us. Sometimes, this will take a while.

You are better than this!

So in the meantime what do we do? Well, in this situation I am guided by an old buddy of mine. He said that, "Taufiq ol' chum, when I am stricken by bitterness, I absolutely distrust my own judgment. I listen to what my bitter reflection has to say (after all, you cannot ignore it since it is inside of you), and I tell myself that I am reflecting in an appalling mood so whatever conclusion I may have is misleading and very wrong. So what my bitterness tells me to do, I shall do the exact opposite. It is not easy ignoring your own sentiments, but at this point in time such sentiments are not worthy of you. You are better that this! Some people call this a form of selflessness. It is a good trait to have."

A friend or two

"And of course.." he concluded, "It is good to have a friend or two to confide in. But no more than that. For not many people are capable of handling your emotions well. And you certainly don't want to confide in a potential shit-stirrer, no matter their best of intentions."

So my friend, if you are feeling bitter about something, do not give up on your good self and give in to these hateful emotions. Have patience, keep your silence and keep company with one or two good friends. You will get through it just fine.

Have a non-bitter day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

It is only 8 in the morning and I am already tired - Rumi & Unity

We are the refuge.

The mosque of the heart,

The temple of mercy,

The church of love,

The synagogue of truth,

A prayer wheel always turning,

A candle always alight,

A fast unbroken,

A sermon burning bright…

In the tolling of the church bells,

In the calling of the muezzin.

It has been a most tiring day, and it is only 8 in the morning! I will see you, sunshine, at the threshold of Rumi's zawiya. Everyone loves Rumi and his poetry, and if they don't then they are not speaking from the State of Unity, and should thus remain silent.

But they are not gonna keep silent. These politicians and preachers of hate and hubris will always have their say. It is all over in the mass media and the internet. Be careful, my friends, of the thoughts and words that you let into your mind. Let your heart and conscience always be the gatekeeper of your inner contemplation!

Have a perfectly wonderful day, pet. Thank you for dropping by.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

WHAT GOD WANTS OF US - the ego-nafs, prophets and saints, devils and other stuffs

13. Beware

Even the ego

Will love the Shaykh,

But for its own

Selfish reasons.

Beware, beware, beware!

14. Beware II

Even the ego

Will despise Satan,

But for its own

Selfish reasons.

Beware, beware, beware!

The Ego. Love, distilled from the impurities of the human ego, would be a remarkable wine. But it would also make it undrinkable. This almanac has sighed, moaned and at times clamoured about man's servitude to his ego, and our need to surmount it. But without the ego, this life-force that makes us wake up, work, play and desiring something other than God, we would not be who we are.

History of the Ego. God created the ego and the nafs a looong time ago (Nafs means human desire, normally associated with our baser / animal instincts. I am not sure whether the two are separate or actually two part of the same entity, so let's call it 'the ego-nafs' for the sake of convenience). And even though the ego-nafs for a while rebelled against God, after an eon of subjugation in the black flames of Hades, the ego-nafs finally relented, acknowledging that God is... God.

So God at the end of it, did not destroy the ego-nafs, nor do I think we, as mortals are entitled or capable of doing so. The Sufi masters often preached, "Do not let the donkey (the ego-nafs) ride you, you must ride the donkey." The Sufi masters did not say "Take the donkey out to the back and shoot it."

The Nature and Cunning of the Ego. So we are mortally married to our ego-nafs, in whatever manifestation the ego-nafs chooses - For the ego-nafs can be the sanctimonious preacher on the pulpit, it can be the envious beggar on the street, it can be the scrooge counting his money during Christmas, it can be the holy warrior 'loving' people to death, and it can be the politicians and their hateful speeches. However you live your life, the ego-nafs can dominate you. And as the two prose above records - the ego-nafs can easily blend into your consciousness, in a guise of love and affection, or in a mask of hate and revulsion. The ego-nafs has no fixed state and will adapt accordingly, for it is never gone, only disguised - Once upon a time, a man was approached by a mystic guru, who asked him, "Do you need guiding to control your ego?" The man only replied, "My ego has no control over me. All the time the ego begs me, 'Feed me! Feed me! Do not ignore me!' And all the time I choose to ignore it. So you see, I have no need of guidance." The guru then said, "Your lack of need is a manifestation of your ego."

He does, you know!

But God Always Wins. When you consider things objectively, by any avenue, God wins - He has Saints and Prophets who will invite you to God, just as he has the Devil and his minions to chase you to God. Good persons and good events to reward you and draw you closer to Him, as well as bad persons and bad incidents or accidents to chase you to Him. This is His World and His House, and as all gamblers know... the House always wins.

So what about us? But that is God's and the Prophet's victory. Inter-spaced between our birth and the Ordained Victory is our actual life. This discordant existence, often made messy and blurry by our inability to control and harness our ego-nafs. And for that, God has armed mankind against the ego-nafs with the most powerful weapons - our reason, our heart and our conscience. But unlike any other wars where victory is decided by who wins in battle, we win by simply showing up at the field of conflict with our reason, heart and conscience intact. That is all it takes, and that is all God wants of us.

Have a thoughtful day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The House of Ego - Your Ungrateful Friend and Teacher...

17. House of Ego

Your ego is an ingrate.

Having ridden you

To despair’s end,

You run to his house begging entry,

“O’ ego! Give me shelter and rest, please”

In a furtive voice behind the door he replies;

“Go away! You are carrying the stink of your conscience.

Come back once you have forgotten your guilt.

Then we can parta-aay once again!”

The ego is a cunning creature. But it can also be overpowering and as overwhelming as a volcano. The ego may come unto you furtively, sliding close to your side, whispering sweet nothings, rationalising and giving a thousand and one reasons why you ought to do what your heart tells you not to do. Or the ego may come like a tide, sweeping you in a moment of passion, masquerading as your heart, lust or greed masked in the happenstances of love.

The ego is ungrateful. But however the ego moves you, once it has completed its task, it leaves you alone to mind your broken peace, your broken heart in miserable solitude. If you come to your ego for comfort, it will turn you away like a beggar. The ego will bide its time when you have passed through your sea of sorrow and regret. And if you forget your lesson, your ego will hook you once again with its bait of pride, lust, greed, envy, hubris and self-satisfaction.

Without the ego, we cannot learn humility. I cannot tell you how to learn your lesson, for we all have our path to face our ego along different milestones in our journey. It is not one single victory or defeat that will damn our happiness in this life. It is forgetfulness. The ego has already been cowed by God Almighty. Now it is through the ego and our interaction with it that we too shall learn our own humility and servanthood. For without darkness, who will recognise light? And if there is no sour, where is the sweetness? This is what I term 'tough love'. Tough but STILL love...

One day, we shall finish our school of life, may we come out of it as good servants to God and Mankind.

Have a helpful day, sunshine. God bless.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Moses and Me (But which me???)

Moses and Me (But which me?)

I am me.

But I am also

Me that is present,

The past me and the future me.

Then I also have the private me

And the public me, the working me

And the playing me. I am the praying me

And the sinning me. The witnessing me

And the witnessed me. I am also my ego, my heart,

My conscience and my soul. And my soul may be

Referring to the soul in my body

Or the soul still in

The Divine Presence.

All this I told Moses.

Moses says that I am running away from accountability.

Moses may have a point. Which is why, however many personas we may have in our lives, we are thankfully fortunate enough to have but One God to turn to. So that no matter how we approach God, and by whichever name we call Him, God is absolutely and resoundingly One. 

This thought is somehow comforting to me. All of me...

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Heading for Sham! Conspiracies, your heart and conscience

13. Sleeping

We are sleepers,

Thoroughly unreliable when awake,

But slipping not when we sleep.

We work in dreams,
And tarry in the closeness of your souls,

You speak of secret guilds,
We are only concerned with patience,
The priceless ornament, set by the Divine Giver
Upon a crown of stars,
Beyond the unique obedience
And understanding of the mighty arch angels.

If you trade in such wares,
Come! Join our caravan!
We are heading for Sham!

SHAM-SYRIA. In the prophecies of the Prophet for the end of time, Sham (which is now Syria) and the city of Damascus wherein resides the Ummayad Mosque, is a place of great importance. Sham is also the final resting place of many Companions and Saints of the faith.

CONSPIRACIES. We are not concerned with the conspiracies of men, nor are we very interested with people who are interested with such conspiracies. We are after all humble and clueless men and women who rely on nothing but God's own divine plan. Not for us are the sort of mortal grand design and plots for world conquest. For as far as I am aware, God conquered the world already when He made it. So there is nothing to conquer except for our grasping and ill-tempered egos.

Ignore that damnable ego that will corrupt every good thing that you have in your life. Be in tune with your heart, sunshine. Feel at ease with your conscience and follow its exhortations to goodness, patience and forgiveness. For when you at one with your heart and conscience, you are at one with the Universe. And that is the first step to knowing the Lord and the Master of the Universe.

God bless.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Consensus, Invention and the Inspiration of Your Conscience

148. Consensus

Certainty is not necessarily with the many.

Truth is not necessarily confined to the majority.

And I believe that the consensus of the learned

Does not contradict this, ergo;

If a bad idea is followed by 1 billion men,

It is still a bad idea,

If a good idea is practiced by just one man instead of 1 billion men,

It is still a good idea.

Inventions. A caveman had to have invented the wheel. An inventor somewhere thought up the internal combustion engine. A scientist had to have first discovered penicillin. A baker now long forgotten must have baked the first white bread. And some ancient traveler must have looked up to the night sky and found stars to be a useful way to navigate. A good idea must originally germinate in the mind of a discoverer before the rest of the world discovers it. 

Ideals. Of course it would be good to build consensus, but sometimes the way of the heart and conscience is on the side of the few and not the many. 

Invent something today, sunshine. Even if it is merely a new optimism for life. And do not despair in following your conscience. I need you to do this, for often do I find my own courage wanting...

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Abraham, Ismail and Jiminy Cricket - Having a weakness for God is not weakness

16. Strong = Weak

I am as strong as I

Am weak, helplessly

In wonder of my Lord

And my Master.

I am the flame of hell,

I am the river of heaven,

I am both,

And really,

I am nothing at all.

There is an old saying that the chain is only as strong as its weakest point. And I think what is applicable for chains are applicable to people. We are really as smart as we are stupid. And our strength is only as strong as our Achilles heel, whatever that may be - It may be our attachments, it could be our temper, impatience, laziness, or perhaps our pride.

That is for the ordinary people like us. It is different for Saints, and for Prophets it is incomparably different. No, they are also bound by the same rule - that man is only as strong as his weakest point (and woman too). But for these gentlemen, their weakness is God. God would say, do 'A', and the Prophets would do 'A'. Then God would instruct them to do 'B', and without (much) questioning they would proceed to do 'B'. Thus how do you contemplate the reaction of the Prophet Abraham, when he was directed by God to sacrifice his son, Ismail (who would later become a Prophet on his on accord, like his brother Isaac). Abraham set to do as he was told, but not without great turmoil in his heart. Seeing the father that way, little Ismail said, "Walk in front, father, and I shall follow you, lest you become affected by the sight of me that you would not be able to sacrifice me and thereby disobey God." Well, I guess you know how the story ends, in the 11th hour God rescinded His command, and told Abraham to put the dagger away. I think an animal was sacrificed instead. 

If our weakness is God, then surely we are as strong as our weakest point - ergo, God. And I think that is a fine thing to achieve. For then you would be one of those who keep getting whispers from who knows where, admonishing you - Look at the beggar, don't you want to help him? You have not called your auntie of late, why not call her? Do you really need to change your cellphone? Didn't your friend's father recently pass away, maybe you can donate some money to them? These businessmen are corrupt, do you want to associate yourself with the likes of them? Yes, some people call this whisper as their conscience. But I would like to think of them as divine guidance. We hear it all the time, don't we, sunshine? The question now is whether we follow it.

May this Day bring you guidance and the strength to follow it, whether you call it a divine guidance, a conscience, or that little fella named Jiminy Cricket.

wa min Allah at-taufiq.

The Trinity of Divine Love - You know, I think we need not worry...

47. We need not worry

We walked a little then paused

By a clear blue stream,

Beside the running water,

You looked at me and enquired,

"Is this a dream?"

And I said no.

We passed over the Bridge of Choices,

And waved to the little dragons

That were perched on top Mount Qaf.

By the shore, we could see a mist,

Descending from an unseen height,

Quietly you took my hand and asked,

"Is this a dream?"

And I replied no.

From where we stood we saw

A glittering heart rising

From the sea, It was bright

As a star, and wide-eyed you asked,

"How could this be?"

And I said, "I don't know".

A ship was waiting for us

At the little harbour of Hope,

We made our way down a pebbled

And sandy path,

Upon reaching the gangway

We could read her name,

"The Faithful".

I looked at the ship doubtfully,

"Do you think it is seaworthy?",

You smiled replying,

"You know, I think we need not worry."

It takes two to tango. But for real love, nothing beats a threesome. That is you, God and the other. This does not in anyway diminish your love. Actually, the trinity of divine love flows from the fountain of truth, and it shatters the hidden tyranny of our egos. For our ego will have its claim in everything, even in matters of the heart. For your ego is changeable as a chameleon, and it easily changes its colours and spots to mimic your heart. Are you sharp enough to notice this cruel deception?

I read an old book a long time ago, and this was what the author had to say about true love and the false love of the ego...

“Oh people, seek real love, a love that cannot go astray. That love is the love of God and the love for His creatures for the sake of His love for them... Love pertaining to the ego is not love, as all the ego knows is to love itself, and what is commonly called love is but a mutual understanding to support each other’s egoism. Don’t trust your ego, nor anyone else’s, for the ego is disloyal by nature.” - OCEAN OF UNITY, Sheikh Nazim al-Qubrusi (Turkey, 1987)

So follow your heart and conscience, sunshine. If you follow it in everything, it is unlikely that your ego can deceive you when it comes to love. Then, just as the prose ends, you can assure your beloved and say, "You know, I think we need not worry..."

wa min Allah at-taufiq

TODAY WE ARE ALL APPLES - Two Apple Stories, the Sufi and Steve

64. The Orchard at the End of Time

….. O’ Most August Lord,

My cart is over laden with throw-away apples.

For on my way to Your Royal Court

I happened upon an apple orchard,

Such as which I have never seen before.

The trees and branches were bone bare,

And the ground overrun with fallen rotten fruit.

But when these sad apples saw me with my mare,

They greeted me and cried,

”Ya Saidi, ya Saidi! Leave us not here decaying and dying, worthless and purposeless. Pity us and take us too to the Fair Court of the Lord. Clean us and expel the worms that lie hidden and eating our core. Help us, ya Saidi, help us!"

…. O’ Most Merciful God,

This is how I now come before You,

With my cartload of bottom-barrel apples.

As how You have made me,

How can I ignore their plea?

…. O’ Most Loving King,

Would You have this servant done some other thing?

While others have left these apples behind,

I took them as mine,

For I knew to whom the orchard belongs to,

And read its name.

It was called, “The Orchard at the End of Time”!

THE MEANING OF THE STORY - It is the belief of the Sufis that I am acquainted with that before time began, all the saints were called to take their pick amongst humanity to be their followers and students (murid). The particular grandmaster (Grandshaykh) of this Sufi Order was the last to take his pick. And what was left were really the rejects. The students which no other masters desired to take on, the hopeless cases - Like my friends. And I guess, like me too. "Well, I will take this miserable lot!" said the grandmaster. And he did it out of love, pity and mercy. And he did it because he saw that this bunch of no-hopers belonged to the people at the end of time, who by their luck of birth are people destined to be the nation of the Prophet Muhammad. So he did it most of all because of his love for his master, Muhammad Habibullah, Mercy to all the Worlds. So we may be bottom-barrel apples, my friends, but everyone wants to be us.

ANOTHER APPLE STORY. Yesterday and today, the local media is overflowing with stories, commentaries and tributes to Steve Jobs, another apple of beautiful aspects. In today's Selamat Pagi Malaysia (Good Morning Malaysia) which is normally a dire television program full of safe and non-threatening stories about the country, its people and religion (especially Islam), there was a long tribute to the life and times of Steve Jobs. They even aired a segment of his speech at Stanford University's convocation in 2005 (Click here for the full 15 minutes video). This is nothing planned. There was no decision made somewhere by some ominous authority in Malaysia to recall Apple's co-founder's exemplary life and death. It was an instantaneous burst of love and affection for a man whose work transcended race, nationality and religion. A man who coaxed a large part of humanity to try and take a bite out of the creative apple.

Today, we are all apples.

wa min Allah at-taufiq.