AL FATIHA, AL FATIHA, AL-FATIHA - death and my guilty pleasures

The almarhum Sultan, at his son's zawiya in 2012, a month of two
after the passing of almarhum Shaykh Raja Ashman Shah.

Learning to Become Unlettered

I am a man of letters,

But when Love found me

Bereft of joy at the loss of a beloved,

I learn to become unlettered.

I learn to let Love write my life for me,

First, a little name was written...

"...Muhammad..."

Then a little phrase,

Next a sentence,

Then Love wrote for me

A whole paragraph...

Before the paragraph turned 

Into pages of paragraphs,

And finally concluding in

One small chapter of my life

That Angels call "One moment in

The life of Notrumi."

.................

Seconds of Love in a Day. I actually thought of ending the prose with "... One day in the life of Notrumi". But I felt embarrassed to do so. Because the truth is, sunshine, I cannot recall any whole day that I have lived allowing Love to write me and finish my sentences and actions. I am afraid that in the 24 hours of my average day, there are only minutes, or perhaps only seconds when Love furnished complete my thoughts, my words and my deeds. And the rest 99% of my day? Well... no doubt I was motivated more by my hunger, my tiredness, my search for recognition, my submission to the aimless distractions that God has filled this world with.

Oh dear.

Guilty Pleasures. I was editing this post when my friend Moses and his wife came by to join me. I felt terribly shy that they might notice my unfinished writing. I felt like a bride in the bridal chamber, and someone had left the door ajar. So I minimised the page, lest Moses might see the guilty pleasure that I am taking with you...

His Joyous Light!

I have no true pleasure in this world,

All that I have felt, all that I can conceive,

All happiness, all joy, all such things that men like to treasure,

To me, they are all guilty pleasures...

For they were not created for me,

But in truth, true Love was written for him,

Muhammad Habibullah.

And I await my real happiness,

My real joy and delight

To be in his presence...

In His Joyous Light!

...............

And I conclude this writing contemplating those whom Allah (swt) has given me the honour and pleasure to know and to know of - The Master, my Master and my Sultan, Sultan Azlan Muhibbuddin Shah ibni al-Marhum Sultan Yussuf Izzuddin Shah Ghafarullahu-Lah, Sultan of the royal state of Perak Darul Ridzuan, Malaysia... who left his physical body after a life well-lived just three days ago to return to the Almighty Sultan of sultans... 

al-fatiha al-fatiha al-fatiha

Oh sunshine, of all my guilty pleasures, perhaps they are my most guilty pleasure of all.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Notrumi Embun, 31st May 2014

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way  

WHAT IS HAPPINESS? ...is it merely pleasure and enjoyment? I think our spirit is created to be infinitely more subtle and refined...

The Key to Happiness

I lay in wait, hunting for happiness,

But happiness eludes me like an elusive thingy,

Then I look to God and the Prophet

And desired that the Almighty and the Beloved

Be happy with me,

And lo! I finally found 

My happiness

In me.

......................

What is Happiness? How do you know where and how to find happiness? But most importantly, would you recognise true happiness if it bites your nose? Is self enjoyment and gratification the final definition of happiness?

Is it merely Gratification and Pleasure? Because if that is true, then food, money, companionship, sex, power, drink and adrenaline rushes are all that it takes to make us happy. But it doesn't, does it? It touches at a visceral and material level, admittedly. But such things do not last. Money is ultimately spent (or hoarded away), food is ultimately eaten and deposited in the toilet the next morning, companionship can be boring at times, you can't have sex all the time, power corrupts, happy drunkenness turns easily into a morning hangover and you can only bungee jump once in a while. At the end of the day, such pleasure and gratification are very transient, plus they take a whole lot of effort and the outcome often unreliable.

I am too tired to look for this so-called happiness. So I have decided to kick off my slippers, give my restless spirit a break and stop looking for happiness. For I just find all this happiness-seeking enterprises to be too much like work. 

Oh, what shall I do now?!

Spade work ahead. Happily, yesterday a solution came to me on the whisper of a wind - a friend said to me, "Look for God and the Prophet to be happy with you... Then you will have all angles covered."

Yeah. That is better, I think. All angles covered. I like that, for I am sure our spirit is created to be infinitely more subtle and refined...

Well, not even my best-est of friends would describe me as subtle and refined. So I know now that I have a lot of spade work ahead of me.  

Be patient with me, sunshine.  

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The Master, the Actor and Door of Exquisite Happiness - earthly and spiritual pleasure, the Divine Presence and you...

The great actor… saying the words with beautiful nuances of humanity and mercy.

I confessed to my master (the actor) my happiness to be with him. Sitting next to him, listening to him and gazing upon his beautifully aged countenance, his lips ever quick to smile, his soul ever quick to give wisdom and hope, his heart ever quick to embrace the meanest of sinners and the worst of servants that is me.

But then he smiled and said this to me, without saying anything at all…

"The greatest pleasure is… spiritual eternal pleasure. Material pleasure physical and transient. One two second *poof!* gone…

"Each day the soul is adorned with finery of spiritual pleasure like a bride prepared for her wedding with her groom. So everlasting joy is the anticipated day when the believer meets his Lord!

A pleasure immeasurable… more than the pleasure of all humanity of this world from the time of Adam, a pleasure more sweet than the anticipated happiness of all couples and lovers of this world, a pleasure even more delightful than the first time you take your child into your loving embrace, a peace more peaceful than the most contented sleep you have ever fell under…  a cup of affectionate joy of the Divine Presence of just one believer would spill over this vast Universe and Creation of God. For Pleasure in the Divine Presence is greater than all the pleasures of this world(s), breaking the nib of the pen of the most ardent lover…  leaving him gasping, and astonished by the Secret Beauty, Hidden Love and Eternal Mercy of his promised meeting with God.

So what is death now to you? It must be a Veil of Love about to be lifted. A Door of Exquisite Happiness about to be unlatched. A Window of Divine Rapture just waiting to be opened. A Book of Sublime Joy about to be taken down from the shelves in the Library of God. And upon its cover is your name!

You may be purring like a cat once you are at the Door of Exquisite Happiness...

You sit by me all day long. And you think of me all night long. I know nothing but I do not lie! So believe me, and in your despair be free forever!

And what name is engraved on that Book? Foolish one! It is 'Muhammad' (s.a.w.)…  it can only be Muhammad(s.a.w.), Habibullah, the Chosen One, The Light of Creation, The Ocean of Mercy anointed by God Himself for the benefit of all humanity and all the world(s) and all the creation!

.........................

Thus spoke the actor yesterday. The actor who speaks harmoniously the script of comfort and succour for humanity, in devotion and affectionate love for the Master, Saydeena Muhammad, Prophet of God (s.a.w.) who returns the salutations of every man, woman and child who remembers him...

Lo! Allah and His angels shower blessings on the Prophet. O ye who believe! Ask blessings on him and salute him with a worthy salutation. (Quran 33:56, Marmaduke Pickthall)

It is Monday morning here, and a gentle shower welcomes the day. God bless you, and may God bless us all.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Better than Heaven - Prose of Ramadhan Part 32

Better than Heaven (Ramadhan Verses #18)

Mr. Baldy: You are not seeking heaven?

Mr. Beardy: Not really.

Mr. Baldy: Then where do you wish to go after you die? What is that place which you desire better than heaven?

Mr. Beardy: What I seek is not a place.

Mr. Baldy: Then what?

Mr. Beardy: What I seek is a feeling and a state.

Mr. Baldy: Your own?

Mr. Beardy: No, not mine. I simply want God and the Prophet to feel happy, and be in a state of happiness with me. In that way, does it matter anymore where I will be?

Mr. Baldy: Hmm. You got a point there.

Mystics, neo-mystics, pseudo-mystics and plain old sinners (like yours truly) like to write sometimes about the 'spiritual stations' as if they are train stations that dot the railway line ending up at Godville, Heaven. I myself am guilty and have written thus in this almanac. Such analogies are of course nothing but useful visualisations of something that is actually a state of belief, feeling and knowledge. Essentially, when one discourses about spiritual stations, you must leave the trappings of physicality and enter into the universe of metaphysics. It simply does not matter where you are now, but more importantly how you feel and what you know - and the answers to that does not reside in you, it resides in the hands of God. If God is pleased with you, no doubt He will make His feelings known to you and within you. He is after all, God.

When you and I kaput, we end our physical existence to enter into realm of the soul. The realm of the heart is so metaphysical that 'metaphysical' itself as a concept expires in its relevance ("Metaphysical?" remark the Angels, "That is SO last season."). Reality is directly and immediately created and recreated by what our heart and conscience aspires to, without any physical condition to hamper our vision and its manifestations. Heaven is a wonderful thing, I am sure. God said so. But for the sufis, for those saints and mureeds of their tariqas, it is still a secondary object to God and the Prophet. Why pander to the wine in the dusty cellars when God, Most Wonderous Distiller of Love and Its Intimacies awaits your pleasure?

Have a lovely Thursday, sunshine. And do consider the old saint's question - If you have God's pleasure, why settle for any other?

wa min Allah at-taufiq.