COFFEE, COMPANY AND A HAPPY ROUND OF ARCHERY - 4 observations on traditional archery

"Dammit... Papa is taking another picture!"

Struggling with Father. I found it absolutely confounding why my 10 year old son, Mika, is so disturbed if I am better than him in archery. Given that we are both novices, perhaps my (temporary) ascendancy is contributed by the simple fact that I train more (there is no place for archery at his mom's place). Yet he seems positively insulted if I were to suggest ways to improve his posture and shooting. So I backed down, and let him find his way, and during moments of his exhilaration during archery, I would (very nonchalantly and without seeming to be 'instructing') throw in a word or two of useful observations.  

I reckon this son-father rivalry is partly because Mika is the only son from my former marriage with his mother. And with only a 6-month old half brother (Ian Emir) to contend with, I guess he finds me to be the only real challenge worthy of his steel. Oh dear.   

Surrender. I wanted to write about the archer's struggle to accept fate, wherever his/her arrow lands. But having started talking about my son, I am drawn to continue along the same line about surrender... For I can see now that Mikhail's willingness or otherwise to accept my suggestions are akin to him surrendering - i.e., submitting to the words of his father. And in a manner of speaking, 'freewill' should be adjusted here, because submission should come as natural as breathing. For that is the only way that I interpret Islam which of course, also means Submission or To Submit, to the will of God Almighty. For unlike me, there is no way God would be unfair and require submission from His servants, if such submission was not fitrah (natural) to our soul. That is the truth of our struggle to follow our heart and soul in love with Allah (swt), rather than the exhortations and persuasions of our ego and nafs (our base desires). 

Stopping the Noise. In archery I am also taught to quiet down and shut up. To silence (or at least to turn the volume down of) the noisy debate in our head, between our many headed ego (just like the hydra). You can hear their din because every miss or hit on the bulls eye draws a response - a sigh of disappointment or a gasp of hubris or simple mute indifference. I cannot deny that this is the most difficult thing to do. To treat success or failure as the illusions that they are, and to learn to surrender to the simple contentment and joy of being alive and doing the sunnah (traditions) archery of Nabi Muhammad Habibullah, the Beloved of God (saws). 

Win? Lose? Whaddaaat?? He he he. 

Blessing in Association. The way of Sunnah Archery is the way of blessing in an association. And I am saying this because I am naturally diffident. Not humble, mind you. I think it is a different personality trait because diffidence can (and in my case, is!) be attributed to some form of inferiority complex. On top of that, I also have a superiority complex (strange and contradictory, but true!), so I often find it hard to make and keep friends. My ego-spine is rigid and is excruciatingly painful for me to bend or unbend for someone.

But even with such character defects (which shouldn't be a surprise to you because, after all, this is the sinners' almanac), more people are coming by, sharing coffee and company, with a round of archery. Not just friends, but my own kin are pleased to join in the very visceral but deeply spiritual joy of traditional archery. I have come to meet and know very kind and generous people, skilled in the art of sunnah archery, tolerant and chivalrous. And strangely, some of them, I have in fact known for years.

I am grateful to my archery-mad friends, especially uberdervish Din Mahidin and Sheik Fuad Bajrai for handing me and Mika a pair of bow and arrows and saying, "Fancy a try?" It has been a compelling journey of a mere one and a half months, but most enlightening. Why, you get to even learn a bit about archery.

So, sunshine, how about it?... Fancy a try?

He he he.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Inner Archery - where the arrow lands is already written by God Almighty even before we drew the bowstring and released the arrow

Inner Archery
I found myself at the archery field
Sending arrows on their way,
I found myself standing on the grass
Still wet with morning dew,
As the slumbering Earth
Awakes with power
For a new day,
Oh my friend, I wondered...
Where oh where are you!?

I found myself in the shaft,
In a quiver of arrows,
In their uncertain flight
To Hu knows where,
For once my part is done
And I have set the arrow free,
Wherever it lands 
Is where my Lord
Wants it to be,

I found myself in the company of a mad man,

Who insists that we were there that day,

Remaining steadfast on the Hill of Uhud,

And thus, I found myself and I found God,

Faithful to the last, standing amongst the good.

....................

The Mystery of the Missing Toilet. After archery yesterday morning, I rushed into my house, leaving the bow and arrows in the car, distracted as I was by an urgent need to relieve my bladder. So much so that I did not even take off my sunglasses. I sped past my father still having breakfast at the dining area and entered the bathroom, not even pausing to turn on the bathroom lights. "Damn, it is dark!", I remember thinking to myself, "So dark that I could not even see the toilet!" And with that I deposited myself on a non-existent toilet and painfully onto the hard tiled floor. My coccyx (the tail end of the spine) is still sore, and thus you find me in my bedroom this morning and not shooting arrows. Still resting after the unfortunate accident.

It appears that my dad is having the toilet replaced, and the contractor has removed the toilet earlier yesterday morning. Of course, I don't blame anyone. No one could have imagined anyone so dumb so as to not notice a missing toilet. He he he.

But at least I am finally going to finish this posting (although sitting slightly awkwardly), thus you will know that I am still very much alive after days and days of no new postings in the almanac. There is always a silver lining in any grey cloud, yes?

Meant to be. I wish I did not fall in the bathroom yesterday. But it was meant to happen. Just like where the arrow lands is already written by Allah (swt) before we even drew the bowstring and released the arrow. And I hope I am accepting both fates with a light heart and loving acceptance of His plan. I am saying this because it is always a struggle when you have to sit with a sore buttocks and type this out. *Ouch!*

He he he.

Have a lovely day, sunshine. May Allah (swt) bless you and may the Prophet Muhammad (saws) support you in all your endeavours in life and love.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

GOD HIDES. YOU HIDE. WE ALL HIDE. - mortal faith, love and hope in the promises of an unseen God.

Hiding

Lovers embracing, hiding in an old chestnut tree,

Children playing, hiding under stairs and in broom closets,

Thunder rumbling, hiding in an overcast sky,

My soul is praying, hiding in unspoken gestures,

My spirit is with my Lord, hiding far from you and I,

......................

Hiding Humans. We all hide. Such is the nature of things. We hide in our clothes, in our makeup. We hide in our wallets, we hide in our credit card accounts. We hide behind our beard and our veils. We hide behind our academic qualifications and in our office title. We hide behind our smiles and charity. Sometimes the form betrays the true reality of our inner selves. But often they are disguises. I am not saying hiding is necessarily a bad thing. It is just how we are wired.

God Hides Too. Indeed, He is the best player in hide and seek. He is perhaps comparable to Time and Sound. For both natural events, like God, cannot be seen, but can be indirectly observed through the movement of the hand on a clock, and experienced by our sense of hearing. And God? Well it is that good feeling you have when you find your lost wallet. The descending calmness of acceptance in the demise of a brother. The smile from a stranger. The encouraging word from a colleague at work. So God is hidden, but He is also felt in our heart. For what other reason would He have made Man with a heart? 

Revelation is a created thing too, an expression of the Divine Will. God is hidden in this world and also in the hereafter. It is only by His choosing that He elects to reveal Himself. But what is true revelation when He is the Creator of revelations and the divine presence? Can the Uncreated One manifest His desire and will in a created thing? A created event? He can of course. It is up to Him. He sets the rules of Creation, He sets the script and the music. He can unbend anything and unmake anything. So in such circumstances are we constantly made aware of His presence and His Goodness. But what direct evidence do we have of His existence? 

Only in our hope upon His assurances... that He is Most Loving, Most Powerful, Most Compassionate and Merciful to us. The All-Knowing, All-Seeing and All-Hearing One. Such is the form He deigns to wear for our sake. What is the Essence of the form? It is beyond our conjecture, for such question is an existential rabbit hole that will break our mind and may possibly drive us blinking mad. I am not going speculating in that direction, for I see only emptiness and madness.

So all we have is in truth, Hope in His Promises. And I guess this is what is called faith (iman) that dwells in the heart of a believer. No one will understand this logic if he or she is not A Student of Love.

Thank God we all are!

Have a beautiful evening, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

YA MAWLA YA MAWLANA - some words strung together. But loosely. You may fit a few infinities between the letters.

Awake in Sleep, Asleep in Wakefulness

O' Allah the Wondrous One,

Let not my attachment to You

Be a hindrance to You,

O' Allah Most Melodious One,

Let not my praises for You

Be a barrier to You,

O' Allah Sender of Dreams,

Let not the waking hours of my apostasy

Drug me to sleep far from You,

O' Allah Owner of Sweetness,

Let not my blessings make

Me one moment forgetful of You,

O' Allah Most Gentle,

Let not my words imprison me,

Let not my life defeat me,

Lead not my hopes astray,

O' Allah,

My words stop here,

But You are Eternal!

Unfathomable, Unique 

The all-Arresting One,

So arrest me, charge me of my crimes,

Imprison me in Your love,

Tether me like a donkey

To Your unspoken Reality!

...................

I am such a sinner. And I have a sin to confess to you. Since writing this blog, I used to schedule my uploads. Sometimes writing them many hours ahead before actually posting them here in the Almanac. But who is to say if God would give me time to live that long? How shameful I have been, taking time for granted... taking God for granted.

So here are the words, pressed into service as fast as my fingers can type them. No delay. As we should not delay in service to Him.

For why delay a lovely thing? Why delay beauty? Why delay our prayers?

Ya Mawla... ya Mawlana...

I had dream. I woke up. I prayed. It lead me here. To you, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

INDEPENDENCE!! - independence for what purpose?

Wearing the Rain

I wear the rain like a dress,

And I drink the golden Sun

From a cup of love.

Whither the worry for tomorrow

When this day is not ended yet?

I wear the dusky sky

Like a bridal train 

Through the aisle of a church,

A mosque, a temple

And a synagogue.

Whither the sorrows for tomorrow

When this day is not ended yet?

................................ 

It is unfashionable to talk about submission. Not when the entire world is motivated towards independence, freedom of choice and individuality. 

In an exchange on Facebook on Malaysia's 56th independence day, a good friend asked me, "Are we really independent?" The question can be answered at many levels of course. The sovereignty of our country, and also the independence of our thoughts, words and actions, as a community and ultimately, as an individual. But to turn the question around, I began to ask myself, independence for what purpose? Freedom of choice and sovereignty to what end?

An ancient friend shared his two pennies worth and said that independence is only worthwhile when one uses one's independence on the path to submission to God. And this is regardless whether they are choices you make while grocery shopping, or as a diplomat in a multilateral summit on international trade. As a common man, minister or a King, we all have our decisions to ponder over.

I guess it is paradoxical... this independence in the path towards submission. But as God Himself revealed in the Holy Quran through divine revelations to the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.)... 

Let there be no compulsion in religion: Truth stands out clear from Error: whoever rejects evil 

and believes in Allah hath grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold, that never breaks. 

And Allah heareth and knoweth all things. (Quran 2:256, Yusuf Ali)

Something to think about, sunshine, on this wet Sunday here in Kuala Lumpur. So don't bother about tomorrow, it hasn't happened yet! 

He he he.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

DRESSED FOR THE MERCY OCEANS - the ego, pious fools and sinners

Dressed for the Mercy Oceans

It is best to dress less 

For a swim in the Mercy Oceans.

So leave your pantaloons of presumptions,

Take off your turban of knowledge,

Unbuckle your belt of pretensions,

Drop your robes of speculations

On the Mercy Oceans' sandy beach,

And leave your veneer of piety

Along with the rest 

Of the disguises

That you have

Gained

Through

All your years of study,

Then follow me,

Unmasked as you truly are,

A journeyman, a sinner.

After all, think about it...

What use for anyone is the Mercy Oceans

If not for Mercy's dispensation?

And who is the guest of the Forgiver

If not for us, the sinners

Seeking to be forgiven?

.........................

Naked before Mercy. Shed what you think you know. Dispense with the dress of knowledge and enter the Ocean of Knowledge untouched as a newborn. In the realm of Mercy, there is nothing you can hide, for why would you want to hide what you need cleansing and redemption of? And really, who are we trying to kid? ... as if God doesn't know already all our misdeeds and miscalculations, all our secret pacts with our ego as we excuse and justify our selfish wants.

It is not easy, this thing we are talking about. In a way, it would be easier for us to peel away our skin then to peel away the layers of hubris that make up what we are. Were it as simple as undressing, you would see a lot more people in society, walking in public, dressed as required by Adab (good manners) but bare naked of their egos... 

Good Intentions. The truth is that the human ego was created by God to be very durable, and this world was created perfectly for the ego. In our little triumphs, our ego extols our own successes, while in failures, our ego blames fate or some convenient others. And greater is the tribulations for those who seek to do good, rather than be a channel for good - It is a fine but important distinction, and graphically described in the famous phrase - "The road to hell is paved with good intentions", and "May God save us from pious fools." Such is our end, when our ego, disguised as righteousness, hijacks our life and what little good that we hope to achieve. May Allah (s.w.t.) save us from our own self-deception!

Submission to the True Good that is the True God. The road to the Mercy Oceans is one paved with submission. For we have set aside the cloak of our own presumption of knowing anything at all. It is not good intentions that drive us to seek the Mercy Oceans. It is actually necessity, our thirst for comfort and assurance, our hunger for understanding and forgiveness that compels us towards its divine waters. And good intentions? Just like our egos, we must forsake our petty good intentions, and give goodness its due to the True Origin and Dispenser of Goodness, Allah (s.w.t.) and His own anointed Mercy to all the Worlds, Muhammad Habibullah (s.a.w.s.).  

And We have not sent you, (o' Muhammad), except as a mercy to the worlds(Quran 21:107)

The delicate questions of our ego, good intentions and submission are all difficult propositions to deal with even for the most saintly ones among us. But God knows us in our best and in our worst. And I think God is only asking that we try. And beyond our faulty and inconsistent efforts for God and His Goodness, ...is His Mercy.

Which brings us back to the Mercy Oceans.

Care for a swim, sunshine?

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

When You Fall in Love, You Lose Your Freedom - towards true servanthood of Love

No Freedom (a song by Dido)

"No love without freedom,

No love without freedom,

No love without freedom,

No freedom without love..."

.....................

Talented is Dido. When I heard this song, the chorus struck a chord in the piano of my soul. I thought of what she sang... "...no love without freedom..." She always had a way with lyrics, this Dido. Below is her music video.

But When You Fall in Love, You Lose Your Freedom - I think this to be true. And if at any point in our relationship, we appear to have a semblance of choice, a veneer of options? Why, the unpalatable truth is that we have not properly fallen in love. 

Divine Love. And that is why in the School of Love that is this world, and in relation to the object of devotion and affection that is our Lord God, I am still in kindergarten. Trying with some difficulty to grasp and to hold unto that which the mystics of Islam and the world call Divine Love. Because I still think I have choices, you see... Therein lies my weakness. 

But I am not too worried, sunshine. Because I also believe that our path, our journey in this life is through that weakness...

Onwards, through the realisation of our utter helplessness, towards true servanthood of Love.

ya Allah, ya Rasulullah... how blessed are we, sunshine.

Have a truly beautiful Sabbath.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Spider-Man, a Radioactive Saint, Mickey Mouse, Hope and Gratitude - some thoughts to chew on...

11. Calamitous you

This world is not a calamity,

And if you are world-weary and pine for death,

Verily it is you that is calamitous,

Not the world.

................

This short terse prose was recorded more than 7 years ago, and I guess it still rings true. For Man (or Woman) changes places where he enters by his sheer presence. This is no magic trick, this is no genetic mutant superpowers or gained by being bitten by a radioactive spider (or saint? He he he).

Yes he can shoot spider webs from his wrist and climb walls, but
Peter Parker would have gained much more if a radioactive saint bit him.
He would have gained a new world.

ADAM CHANGED EARTH. We are simply following the traditions of the Prophet Adam when he landed on Earth, and changed this barren planet into a lush green paradise. Not many people can do that, to generate an entire eco-system of a planet by their mere presence.

Yea, poor Adam and Eve were banished from Heaven. But had they not been exiled,
there would be no green Earth, and no you, no me.

RAPUNZEL NEEDS A HAIRCUT. But in a small way, we can change the places that we gain entry into. For good or bad. For if we enter Disneyland with a despairing hate-ridden spirit, no Cinderella, no Rapunzel, no Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck would count to make this world better. In fact we would probably look at Cinderella and think her a blonde bimbo, Rapunzel a hippy who badly needs a haircut, Micky Mouse a giant disease-infested rodent and Donald Duck a spiteful hateful fowl. And Disneyland becomes nothing but an odious temple to pop culture and rampant consumerism.

This is Shaykh Nazim or simply
referred to as 'The Mawlana'. Well,
I call him The Radioactive Mawlana and
I hope that he will one day bite you!
Or are you bitten already?

HOPE AND GRATITUDE. But if we enter a house or even a room of people, with a joyous heart and a light shining from within, suddenly humanity ain't so bad after all. The world ain't so bad after all. And indeed, we have much to be grateful for and have hope. You need both you see - hope and gratitude to make this magic work. To make you work. For if you have no gratitude, what you count as hope is in fact a desperate anticipation that things MAY work your way. Hope is a bit more complex than that. Hope relies in submission to another being, a state of surrender to the state of love of another, that 'another' is of course our common Creator, aka God.

THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN... And in this spiritual syllabus, there is no teacher better and greater than the Prophet Muhammad(pbuh), and no heirs more loyal and true to him than the Saints. To find one, or to be found by one (the latter is more likely) is the greatest gift that Providence may leave at the threshold of your soul. From there, you may learn the beautiful truth and interplay between Hope and Gratitude.

God bless you, sunshine. Always love your company.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Love & Wisdom. Knowledge & Attachment.

1. The Prism of Love

You cannot see

God and His Beloved,

Through any other prism,

Save of the Prism of Love.

There are many who claim this,

But they divide and they ostracize,

Then count themselves as wise.

They do not comprehend,

For when you are enamoured

With your own relationship

And attachment, even

With the Divinity,

Then, sadly,

Your wisdom

Is broken,

And your cup,

Empty.

..................

It is okay really. It is okay to be so enamoured with God and to find your cup of wisdom broken, and your wisdom slowly seeping into the earth like cold milk. After all, what do we really know except to love and hope that we are loved in return? I am tired of looking for the keys to the Library of Knowledge, and perhaps now I am only looking for the secret gate to the Garden of the Lovers. For you see, I know myself only too well. Give me too much knowledge and 'wisdom' and I am sure to neglect or even misuse it.

Throw Me a Rope

Let the wise ones look for wisdom.

I am looking for love and

To be taught the courtly manners

Of courtly love and chivalry.

If you are already there, throw me a rope...

In your kind friendship to me

Is my sweetest hope...

...............

Have a lovely Friday, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The Heart & The Doormat

The Heart & The Doormat

I am locked outside of my heart,

With too much hate on my face,

In my hands and on my lips,

There is a doormat outside my heart,

And my Master is commanding that I

Wipe away all the hate in me before entering.

"But what if I am all hate?"

I asked my Master.

To which he answered,

"Then as nothing you shall enter.

And if you but knew,

That is for you

So much the better!"

.......................

I write of love, my friends. But the truth is I am often full of bitterness and hate. I ask that you pray for me, that I may enter my own heart.

Do not be afraid. For you are living in tumultuous but great days. Many of you will be presented with the key to your own hearts. My hope is to witness the joyous occasion as you pass the threshold into the beautiful sanctum of your conscience. Share your experience with me, that you might give hope to this foolish man. Your abiding friendship for someone like me, I shall never forget.

Have a beautiful day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

LIGHT UPON LIGHT AND THE INCREDIBLE EQUATION

Who were you?
O’ Taufiq,
What were you?
Who were you?
How could you ever be
Anything or anyone,
Before in your life,
I came to be?

O’ Taufiq,
What delight did you feel?
What sorrow did you drown in,
Before you ever knew Me?

Whatever you were,
Whoever you were,
It matters not.

Not now,
Not when you are
Finally with Me.

Your life,
And your memory
Begins now, o’ Taufiq,

With Me.

LOVELY RAIN. I was driving home through the wet streets of my neighbourhood. Just a couple of yards ahead on the left is my house. I am very happy that it rained this evening. My room faces the evening sun, and for a couple of days it felt like a sauna. I have an air-conditioner but it’s broken. I haven’t replaced it because I procrastinate. Tomorrow, I will say. Or next week. Or perhaps next month. So each night I am at the mercy of nature.

THE AC IS DECEASED. As I was driving with my friend, Munim made an observation. For I was exclaiming, “Alhamdulillah, it is raining!” Then I said, “Well, Munim, my air-cond may be kaput, but if it was working fine I would probably not feel as happy as I am right now. In response Munim nodded sagely, saying, “Yea, dude. Sometimes not having something permits you the privilege of experiencing happiness in a way not open to others who have that something.” Hmm. Then I guess I should count myself lucky that my AC is deceased. But I wonder if I will feel as blessed the next time the late evening sun turns my bedroom into an electric grill. It is the hardest test, and the easiest lesson in the world… for often I have heard a Master say that…

The Incredible Equation
Being Nothing (you) Makes the Appreciation of the Only True Something (your Lord) possible.

LIGHT UPON LIGHT. I guess another key to happiness is learning to play with our expectations. And to remember that life, like love, must be taken ‘as is’. True Love, the high Lamp in the firmament of Divine Mercies will give this to you, I think. But do not read this as fatalism. The only thing that will perish when you drink your cup of love is fear and uncertainty. ..

A CUP OF LIGHT
Pick up the Cup of Love and
Take that sip of Light, sunshine.
Drink and let begin your life and memories,
The ‘Light Upon Light’…and
The Inexplicable Mercies.

Two new prose in less than 24 hours. This is a rare thing. And the only thing more wonderful is the fact that you are reading it. Now that is truly the Lord’s gift to me.

Have a wonderful day, luvvies.

Pax Taufiqa

Tolerance is a Sign of Strength, Intolerance is Sign of Weakness

The cave of the terrorists
Is not the Cave of Hira,

The belt of explosives
Of the suicide bomber
Is not the steel-mail shirt
Of Saladin,

The preachers of hate
Are not Imam Ghazali,

The Jihad postings on the web
Is not the Qasida Burdah,

The murder of innocents
Is not the war of Khalid al-Walid,

Fatalism is not
Submission,

The mad mob jumping
And screaming 'AllahuAkbar'
Is not the noble beauty
Of the whirling Rumi,

The beardies sending boys
To their early doom
Are not the Companions of Mercy,

The fatwas of the Taliban Council
Are not the judgments of Noble Ali,

The burning of books by ‘Islamic’ fighters
Are not the traditions of

The Ancient Libraries of Baghdad and Andalusia,

The claims for ‘rights and freedoms’
Are not the claims of servanthood,

And for some…
Labeling something as Islamic
Is the easiest lie of them all.

Glossary for Poem -

Cave of Hira is the cave where Muhammad regularly retreats to for meditation, and where he first received revelation from God through the archangel Gabrial.

Imam Ghazali is an ancient master of the Shariat (Law) and Tarikat (Path-sufism) of Islam.

The Qasidah Burdah is an ancient song of praise for the Prophet. CLICK HERE for a beautiful rendition of the music (with translation)

Khalid al-Walid, companion of the Prophet is also known as Saifullah, the Sword of God. CLICK HERE for an amazing video depiction of him.

Submission is the essence of Islam.

Noble Ali is a Companion and the 4th and last of the Rightly-guided Qaliphs

Why is the sinner sharing this with you, sunshine? Simply because tonight a little bird perched on my right shoulder, and into my ear he whispered...

Tolerance & Intolerance

Intolerance is not a sign of strength, it is a sign of weakness,

Tolerance is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of strength.

Have a good rest this Sunday, pet.

Pax Taufiqa.

Sinners' Dictionary - the Meaning of Patience and Mothers

30. Patience is a …
Patience is a jewel
Set between the
Contracting and expanding
Of the heart.
It is in the pause
Between a cause
And consequence,
Between revelation
And either submission
Or rebellion.

Patience is a good thing. Indeed, a good dead friend of mine once said that it is the KEY to happiness. "It is not inaction," he said. "It is ACTIVE submission to life's ups and downs, and to do such things which commonly gives you happiness. This is important to remember, Taufiq," His tone pressing the point, "Patience is not mere fatalistic acceptance."

Then he smiled and poked my belly. "So you know you are fat, but more importanly, unhealthy. What are YOU going to do about it?"

Sigh. Everyone wants to make a comment. But I guess its because there is just a lot of everyone who loves us and cares for our wellbeing.

It is smart to submit to God's Love. Because ultimately, we ALL submit one day, breathing our last, and closing our eyes upon the last sight of our beloved family and friends, crowding around our deathbed. I was there when my mother submitted to God's final call. She did not struggle anymore, she simply closed her eyes and never opened them again. After a life-long practice of active submission, I could almost hear her answer, "Yes, yes, my Lord. I am coming. What kept You?"

Love and Death. Isn't this the Truth of our existence shared by all of us? If this is so, why do we bother fighting during the brief time alloted to us from the moment our mother cradles us in her arms and the time we are finally lowered into the embracing earth of our grave? May God guide us all in the unity of our worship to the One God, however we may extol His Praise, and by whatever name we call unto Him.

This is a prayer that is close to my mother's heart, and I believe, in the heart of all mothers. God bless all our mothers!

Pax Taufiqa.

If My Heart is Stone Cold, Burn Me, Layla...

16. Whatever Mould
O’ Layla,
If my limbs have withered,
Heal me, that I may come to thee,
Walking or crawling.

And If my heart is stone cold,
Burn me, that I may melt into
Whatever mould that thou may hold.

This is what I call an uncommented poem. So I better stop now before my non-comment amounts to a comment of sorts.

Have a beautiful day, sunshine - and may each of us find our Layla.

Pax Taufiqa.

A Silly Little Man With Too Much To Say

THIS BLOG CONSISTS OF ONE SINGLE WRITTEN DOCUMENT BUT BROKEN UP INTO POSTINGS. I have noticed that in all the prose recorded by the sinner over almost 8 years (and they are a lot!), I have often had to fight the impulse to continue writing a poem. This is simply, from where I am writing, one story crosses into another story, and on and on and on. You might say that I have written up to now (since July 2010, when I really started getting serious about this blog) only 1 single writing - its just that it has been divided into 299 as of now.

BUT HONESTLY AND TRULY - I am writing about the same thing again and again, it's just that the perspectives are always different… I am describing an apple, but this apple is unimaginably beautiful and forms layer upon layer of infinite meanings. This singular apple is our Maker (aka God) in all His beautiful Attributes. In this picturesque apple is also mankind, resting between the Lord's and the Messenger's Hand, a constellation of stars adorning the night sky between the rising sun of Ahad and the setting Moon of Ahmad. This is how I see you. And this is how I see the world really.

BUT I AM NO HIPPY. You know, this doesn’t mean I am a hippy. I do not have a rose-tinted view of the world. My work itself (I am a solicitor doing mostly corporate work) means that I am daily dealing with rights, privileges, obligations and promises made for money. From my experience there is no such thing as a free lunch in the reality of any commercial enterprises, whether you are running a children’s television show, a fish farm, a design house or a public listed construction company. At the end of the day, it is all about fulfilling our responsibility and differing roles – which in my case would be as a friend, lover, a service provider, boss, father, son, brother and nephew. And I know, it is not the easiest thing in the world for you too.

SO A TOAST TO YOU - For your own present and future success in fulfilling your responsibilities. Responsibilities are not obstacles or even diversions in your search for the meaning of life, love and God. It is the path by which all lovers come to fully comprehend the meaning of love… for isn’t God Ultimately Responsible for us too? So rest your responsibility upon His responsibility for you. And open your heart to those around you who are there to ease your burden and share your every day worries, riddles, exasperation and tears – our beloved family and friends.

Today I open my heart to you, sunshine. It is dusty, cluttered and needs tidying up, but it’s all I have for you. So I hope you can accept me as I am. Just a silly little man with too much to say!

Hehehe,

Pax Taufiqa.

The Key to Happiness Now is to Know Your Lord Now - and not after you have shaked hands and rubbed noses with Mr. Death

1. Your Lord is the One and the Unique.
Your Lord is the One and the Unique,
And He is gazing upon you in all time,
In your past, present and future,
In your life and in your afterlife.

Do you think your personality
Will change in your afterlife?

If you feel misery now,
Will you not feel misery later?

If you feel happy now,
Will you not feel happy later?

If God is the Lord of Happiness of the hereafter.
Is He not the Lord of Happiness in this life?
Remember, when He gazes upon you,
It is all of you, you one second ago,
You two years in the future, you in heaven,
You before you were born, you in all times.

If you are sad, depressed now,
If you are fearful,
If your are jealous and full of envy,
If you are intolerant and
Full of miserable curses,
If you find this life untenable,
And that life is unfair,
Are you not denying your Lord’s attribute?
Complaining, “He does not love me,
Otherwise He would not treat me this way!”

So, do think of heaven, if it pleases you,
But remember, here and always,
That you will always be you,
And God will always be God.

And if you find contradictions
In what God is and what God
Appears to do to you,
Then remember, it is you
Who are in contradictions,
And not God.

That is the key to happiness,
To knowing your Lord.

It is good to have your eye for happiness in the hereafter. But if you are unhappy now, do you think you shall be happy after you shake hands and rub noses with Mr. Death? If you are not pleased by what God has granted you right now, will you ever be pleased by what is on offer in the shop windows of Heaven? If you are not satisfied now, if envy colours your world, if jealousy is your master, good heavens, how will you live without them in the next chapter of your soul? I am saying this as a marker to myself today, to remind this old sinner to stop bitching and complaining. And to see in my son's eyes (Mika has a bit of fever and is missing school today) my happiness vouched for me already from the moment my soul was pulled from nothingness till today, and Godwilling for an eternity of todays!

God bless you, sunshine, for all that you are to me.

Pax Taufiqa.

Ask God for God - From the Sinners' Guide to Shortcuts and Cheat Codes

If you happen to bump into Sufis, you will notice a certain habit that they have - They are not satisfied to pursue heaven in the afterlife. Oh no, such things are not good enough for them. They desire the Divine Presence Itself with God and His Beloved (Muhammad). Heavenly angels, rivers of milk and honey, trees that light up like Christmas Trees are not good enough for the likes of them. They see it all as distractions - divine and blessed, but distractions nonetheless.

I think they are right in their presumptuous claims. After all, why be reticent when it is God Himself asking you to ask Him? Why be shy with your ambition? Why dither and waver before True Love's Beauty? If your heart is trembling and quaking thinking of God, then ask Him to sooth your yearning. Right or wrong, you (we all) belong to Him. So ask God rightfully for God Himself. Do not waste your time like the villagers who scramble to carry away the Sultan's riches and treasures but forget about the Sultan Himself. ("The Sultan & His Gift, Worldly & Spiritual Distractions - Love Bites on your Soul" Click here on earlier posting)

Its a lovely Sunday evening, and the afternoon thunderstorm that has been uprooting trees in my city has gone away. All that is left now is me writing this, and you, sunshine, reading my blog. Thank you for dropping by.

Pax Taufiqa.

Objectivity? What Objectivity?

Mika was looking for objectivity,

I told him, "Don't bother."

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OBJECTIVITY? My last posting was labelled 'the uncommented prose'. What this means is that the prose published is not commented by way of any writing whatsoever. The prose stands as is, not expanded or qualified in any way by me. But is it uncommented when it already has a heading? I think that whatever or however we choose to say or write, nothing goes uncommented. Which means that objectivity doesn't truly exist. There are only personal experiences...
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19. I notice that…
Human observations never go naked
Without a gloss of objectivity
To hide what are, in truth, personal experiences.
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ABSOLUTELY EXISTING. Absolute objectivity doesn't exist, not when the SIngle One True Object pre-existing and actually existing is the Lord - The AbsoluteLY Existing and Eternal Essence. We are just reflections of His Divine Utter Absoluteness to which there is no comparison to the human intellect. But so long as you and I are here on planet earth, we must strive to understand this world for this is the best way for us to understand and come to love Him. The path of the aspirant is not to reject the world, but to comprehend the meaning of this world, its purpose and how he may serve God and His creation.

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196. You Have Chosen
Now that you are chosen
To be corporeal,
So you must study
The reflections, veils and mirrors
That are the trappings
Of your corporeal existence.

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TRUE MEANING OF THE PURPOSE. It is not for us to check-out from the World of Forms. As death has taught us, checking-out is wholly the province of God, not for us to chase nor postpone for a single milisecond. So while we are here, let us attend to the purpose God has set for us. The holy scriptures say this simple reason - that mankind and djinn are not created for mere sport, but to worship their Creator. And if you find this simple purpose either burdensome, dull or a lot of ho-hum, then surely, you have not found its true meaning.

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ONE MORE DAY! It is only touching 7am this Sunday morning. I am catching the early glimpse of the Sun dawning upon this world of men. So it appears that God has permitted one more day for us to find the true meaning of our existence, in as far as we may be guided. May we all be guided to the very best and joyous of meanings, and may we have the wisdom to accept and follow such guidance.

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And in the meantime, we can still pluck the low-lying fruits that God has blossomed in our grove for us to love and ponder upon - such as the overwhelming love you have for your children or parents, which is a mere glimpse of the Love of God, just like the sun now rising upon our day! Just like this pair of perfect and naughty yellow bananas!
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When I have absolutely nothing else to add, I bring out the heavy guns of Love, Mika and Rafa. Hehehe. Have a lovely Sunday, sunshine..

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Pax Taufiqa