THE VIRTUE OF SILENCE - adab, scandals and gossips, discretion and the veil over your sins...

A Drop of Adab

Give me a drop of Adab

Than an ocean of knowledge.

Give me a single pause of Adab

Than the most persuasive speech of the orator.

.............................

The ancient ones value Adab (courtly courtesy and manners) above all else, even knowledge. For Adab is the inner and outer expression of our understanding or lack of understanding. 

Adab tells us when to keep silent and be discreet, and Adab also teaches us when to speak up and also be discreet. Adab is the highest form of human action through which we conduct our affairs with discretion. 

Scandal! Do you like knowledge? For knowledge is a two-edged sword whose edges are very sharp indeed! How do you like being told of a dark secret of someone else? Such knowledge (let's be honest here) is titillating, true. But after the brief moment of dark pleasure at someone's unfortunate contratemp or mistake (for it is a misfortune), we are suddenly weighed with the burden of knowing. And our ego is whispering ever so urgently to us, "Go on... tell it to him. Share this with someone... !"

Like a steak, a scandal is often juicy. But it is bad for you.
And even worse if you share it with someone.

Some people may reason, "But fate has disclosed his/her indiscretions to me! So the general prohibition against talking bad about someone must surely now not apply in this scandalous case! Anyways, it is the truth about him/her!" Hmm, persuasive but...

Gossip

O' foolish traveler! 

O' wayward listener to gossips and scandals!

Draw the veil that someone has saw fit to lift

Over the indiscretions of someone else,

That perhaps Allah may keep the veil

Over your own errors!

............................

When you think about all the preachers and evangelical politicians in this world, when you think about all the news, postings, comments, blogs, websites and portals covering Islam, it is ironic that in most instances, what Adab in Islam demands is silent contemplation. 

He he he. So it appears that I have written myself into a corner. So I better stay here for awhile and speak no more.

Have a lovely Monday, sunshine. May Allah (s.w.t.) and His Beloved Nabi Muhammad Sayyidina Alamul Huda (s.a.w.s.), guide you towards the perfection of your Adab. There is no purpose more beautiful than this single purpose!

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Some 'Truths' Are More Poisonous Than Ignorance

1. Scattering truths
A man was in the marketplace
And he had the insight to
See into people’s errors and sins,
He was creating a great chaos
And trouble revealing people’s
Secrets and scandals, until
Finally, a dervish appeared
Amongst the crowd
And inquired,
“And just who are you?
And by what right do you
Scatter scandals about like
Some largess?”

“Because I am a servant of Truth,”
He replied.

“Nay, you are mistaken.
The task of real servants are
To reveal the nature of their Lord
To mankind.
But what are these secrets that
You disclose but mere weaknesses
And follies of men? These are
Ugly facts you reveal here!
Are you saying the Lord is ugly?
It is not Truth you serve,
It is calamity.
You lie.”

Whereupon, the man immediately perished.

...............

I am not particularly fond of tabloids and scandal sheets. In fact I try to avoid them. Yet it appears to me that there is a considerable number of people out there who like them, since tabloid newspaper sales have always been pretty stable while serious broadsheets have seen their sales decline. The sad thing is when serious newspapers pander to the titillating scandals which populate the scandal mags. I guess it is purely a commercial reason as it generally boosts up circulation and thereby help preserve the editor in his position.

In the delicate lore of Islam there is a not-so delicate perspective in the holy scriptures which says that when you talk bad about someone behind his/her back, it's like eating the flesh of your kin. *Urghh...* That is definitely disgusting, and I guess that is the way the Divine wants people to carefully weigh what they say and share with people. Yet that is the most common error which people fall into, and it is ironic that some Muslims can fast and pray five times a day without fail but become a veritable gutter-mouth, repeating the sin and scandal of others for the titillating pleasure of the listener / reader.

As a sinner, you might say that I have a vested interest in propagating the belief that the mankind habit of spreading the stories of sin (especially personal vices) of another person is dead wrong. And you are right, I do. But, hey, this is not what I am saying. The Most Compassionate and the Most Merciful is the one expressing it. And when I think of the distraught and shame felt by not only the sinner, but his family and close friends when they read about their son/brother/daughter/niece/cousin or friend in the scandal pages..., well it doesn't leave a nice feeling in your gut, does it?

We cannot stop the newspapers from being sold, but I think we can stop buying them. Let us rest our soul from reading about Mr.X bonking his live-in maid. It is of no concern to us directly, and our life doesn't improve by us knowing such facts, assuming they are true to begin with. And really, some 'truths' are more poisonous than ignorance.

Well, if you do need one scandal today, then I will volunteer one - I am scandalously late for work... so I must run for now.

God bless you, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa.