THE PILGRIMAGE - an epic 30 postings travelogue of a sinner dressed as a pilgrim

You must forgive me. I did not plan to procrastinate so, but between my work and my play, my friends and my family, I have had little time to organise this almanac. But since arriving home from Singapore late Sunday night, I was committed to set up a page about the pilgrimage (umrah haj) I undertook in 2011. You can get there by simply Clicking Here, or going to the astutely named 'THE PILGRIMAGE' on the pages list on the right hand column of the blog.

There is enough to read and see in the thirty specific postings listed in that page, so I shan't trouble you with too many words here.

God bless you!

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way 

The Hijaz, The Caliph and The Star of Al-Saud - the story of a good custodian

Some Background Information

I sometimes visit the sohbet (sermon) website of Mawlana Shaykh Nazim Adil ("the Mawlana"). He is the grandshaykh of the Naqshbandi Sufi Order currently residing in Lefke, Cyprus. It was he who shared with the world news of the new Caliph of Islam for this epoch, his majesty King Abdullah II of the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan. This information has not been picked up by mainstream media, but the divine stone has been cast into the ocean of creation, and its ripples will become waves and the waves will become tsunamis. It is a reckoning for Truth, Love and Mercy prophesied, but in God's own time.

Recently there was a sohbet entitted “The Star of Al-Saud”, and the sinner was surprised by the mere title. This is because, since the advent of the Saud family in Hijaz and their capture of Mecca, Medina and the rest of the Arabian peninsular, they have been active proponents of Wahhabism, that black aberration of Islam and the cause of great discord and violence not only amongst the nation of Muhammad, but has spilled out in its terrible fury upon the non-Muslim world... an aberration fueled by oil money, drilled and sucked out of the Arabian desert sands with the connivance of western oil mega-corporations.

Exporting oil and Wahhabism world wide...

For the Naqshbandis, and indeed for all Sufis and rightful thinking Muslims, the number one sin, the numero uno error and the Great Lie perpetrated by the Wahhabis is their active policy to destroy the religious practice of venerating the Prophet(pbuh) and his household, which stands not as a prop or optional accessory of being a Muslim, but a sacred and sacrosanct tenet of the Islamic Faith - For you cannot be a Muslim if you are not a Muhammadan. In their blind hatred of history, and ill-thought ignorance and prejudices, the Saud-backed Wahhabis not only have sought to disconnect the Prophet(pbuh) from his nation, but also to destroy the essence of Islam, which is the teachings of the tariqas (Sufi Orders) of the Saints of Islam. To this end they and their followers the world over have sought to destroy the books, tombs and graves of great Muslim Saints, as well as suppressing tahlils (periodical Muslim prayers for the dearly departed) and visitations to the graves of our kin. Not even being a Companion of the Prophet saved the tombs of some of the great Companions of Muhammad(pbuh). Such is their shameful conduct and for which they must answer to God and the Prophet(pbuh), these defilers of maqams (tombs).

1. If The Kaaba …

If the Kaaba is a diamond,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to pry off the gemstones

That dot her ornate setting,

If the Kaaba is life,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to choke her breath,

If the Kaaba is the sun,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to eclipse her moons,

If the Kaaba is justice,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to conceal her mercy,

If the Kaaba is the universe,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to rewrite her history,

If the Kaaba is a writer,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to be her censors,

If the Kaaba is Rapunzel,

The defilers of maqams are conspiring to cut off her golden tresses.

That is want they want.

But who can they harm but themselves?

And what can they defile but their own name?

Thus it is with this foreknowledge that our friends were surprised by the title of the sohbet – A star of Al-Saud?? Surely not! But surely yes, because God in His Infinite Mercy and the Prophet in His Blessed Station are not limited by human prejudices - Always our Lord looks for good reasons to forgive and to rain blessings upon us.  Read on...

.....................

The Star of al-Saud

In his Sermon (Click Here to go to the Video and click on the subtitles for your preferred language), the Mawlana recounted his experience of being awaken one night by an inspiration to his heart. Some words and visions bestowed with great force upon his old frame concerning the passing of Crown Prince Nayef bin Abdul Aziz al-Saud of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia at the age of 79. In the vision, brought unto him by the Saints of the holy city of Mecca, was that of the Crown Prince, having died in Switzerland on the blessed night of Laylatul Mikraj, and a sight of angels descending from heaven and taking his soul, and praying over him in the holy city of Mecca, as per his wish to be buried in the Haram precinct.

The Star of Al-Saud, the late Crown Prince Nayef.
al-fatiha...

The Crown Prince (said the Mawlana) was dressed in divine light, his face was calm and peaceful as the angels and saints prayed over him. He even smiled and blinked at the Mawlana when he notice the Mawlana looking on. Mawlana declared that no other previous king or prince of the Saud house has ever reached this spiritual station, the example of Godly reward for a believer... even for one who is a prince of the Saud House. And what was it that he did to earn this miraculous gift?

Breaking into sincere tears, the Mawlana shared that the crown prince had 2 secret desires…

The First Desire

The crown prince, inspired by God by his belief in doing the right thing, desired to return Hijaz and the two holy cities of Islam, Mecca and Medina to the rightful owners, which is the household of the Prophet(pbuh). Yet, perhaps it came too late in his life, by which time he had no powers left in his hands to manifest this secret desire. Had he lived longer? But it was simply not meant to be...

The Prophet's Mosque in Medina wherein resides his tomb

The Second Desire

Secondly, the crown prince was inspired to desire spending and giving away his wealth and treasures. For he was awaken to the danger and risk of hoarding wealth. For those who are not generous with the treasures that God has given them, God shall withhold His treasures from reaching them. Hoarding like Qarun, hiding their assets in secret bank accounts, secured warehouses and offshore tax-free havens, what good is wealth to them who have passed away? For Mawlana reminds us that the good believers are those concerned only with obeying God and doing the right thing. To such blessed souls, this world and all its treasures are less than the dust beneath their feet - Most honoured are they in the Divine Presence! But alas, this too the crown prince was prevented from achieving by his death.

But such is the generosity and mercy of God, that even though the crown prince was prevented from achieving these two good intentions, his secret desires reached the Knowledge of God and the Knowledge of the Prophet. And verily, by merely holding these sincere good intentions, he was rewarded in magnificent heavenly splendor when finally, his body breathed its last and his heart stopped beating.

Aye, the crown prince did. He rocked for Mustafa* and Mustafa heard!
(*Mustafa is an epithet for Muhammad(pbuh) meaning The Chosen One)

The Reminder

Had you but one atom of goodness in you, surely God would forgive you and bring you into the company of the angels and blessed souls. But to the reigning sons of Saud, the Mawlana had one final word to say. A reminder from the Prophet – In the end of time, tell them that God Himself prays (and gives praise) over me. And yet you prevent prayers to be made over me? On the Day of Judgment, I shall be your opponent!

A beautiful sermon but alas summarized. Do not take my word for it, sunshine. Click on the link and watch for yourself. Watch the Mawlana, look at his eyes, his posture and his tears overcome with love and mercy, his tired sitting, and his trembling frame as he stands in prayers that he enjoins for the sake of humanity.

.....................

Thus what is the conclusion of this? Will the Saud family (with their many, many princes) return the Hijaz and the two holy cities to the rightful owners, the Household of the Prophet(pbuh), one heir being King Abdullah II of the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan - the Caliph of Islam and Commander of the Believers? Will it happen in our lifetime? When our little band was in Medina and Mecca last year, already our friends sensed a change in the air. Ah, such is the suspense and wonderful tension being written upon the script of destiny by the Greatest Writer of them all, aka God Himself.

King Abdullah II of Jordan, Caliph of Islam, Commander of the Believers,
Shadow of God on Earth, Lion of God (far right, sitting), at the funeral of Prince Nayef,
the Star of Al-Saud. 

We are living in interesting times, sunshine. Stay by me and I shall keep you posted, so long as it is thus fated. 

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

COMMERCE & SPIRITUALITY - Between the enjoyment of consuming, and the happiness of giving and sharing...

Abbot: Mine is made in China. What about yours?
Muslim Dude: Golly! Even my 'little Kaaba' is made in China.

Holy Days and Holy Wastes

Romantic love rules the airwaves,

Anniversaries and Valentine’s Day,

Motherly love rules on Mother’s Day,

Fatherly love rules on Father’s Day,

Friendly love rules on Birthdays,

And thankfully... Godly love is celebrated

On the His Holy Days, 

But every day the love is ruined

By over-commercialization

And exploitation, the message

Lost in a morass of holy waste

And religious haze.

……………….

COMMERCE AND SPIRITUALITY. Actually, even before the Prophethood of Muhammad (pbuh), commerce and religion has always been intertwined. You need only visit the Muslim holy cities of Mecca and Medina, to see pilgrim-tourist businesses thriving along the Masjid Nabawi and the Masjidil Haram. And Jerusalem too, the shared holy city for the Jews, Christians and Muslims. Everywhere you can find faux relics of saints and prophets, the Hand of Fatima, the Turkish Ward against the Evil Eye and all sorts of rosaries, tasbihs, clay and china figurines of the Virgin Mother, Verses of the Quran and Bible framed and sometimes etched on sheep skin, miniature little Kaabas, whirling Mehlevi dervishes and etc. The beauty (or crassness, let’s be honest here) of the spiritual souveniers is only limited by the imagination of the artist or the prolific factories in China, where all these religious bric-a-bracs appear to come from.

Jerusalem, present day. This procession of the Christian Nuns
have been going on for the longest time.

SPECIAL ……… (insert your religious festival here)……. PROMOTION! So I am going to be realistic and not proceed to condemn the commercialization of religious holidays and festivities. But like all things in life… it ought to be done in a measured and sensible level. There was once a time in Malaysia, when the Muslims tend to scorn the commercial exploitation of Christmas – you know, all that glittering Christmas trees, Santas and Santarinas on hire, and the give-your-loved-ones-Xmas-presents-though-you-will-max-your-credit-card kinda promotional ethos of the big super malls of Malaysia (oh yes. We have them aplenty). But now, alas, I do not really see that much difference between the Muslims and Christians. Muslims too can be guilty of unparalleled consumerism during the Eidul Fitri celebrations - New curtains, new sofas, new cellphones, new laptops, new TVs and even new cars sometimes.

Jerusalem, 1915. The last recorded procession of the Ottoman's
Feast for the Prophet Moses. 

A FINE BALANCE. And I shan’t be a party-pooper or Mr. Killjoy. After all, we are not saints. Nor are we Christian, Hindu, Buddhist or Sufi hermits. But I think there must be a fine balance we can strive towards... between self-gratification and philanthropy, between the enjoyment of consuming and the happiness of giving and sharing. 

CONCLUSION. Whether you are a Muslim or Christian (or Jew, Hindu, Punjabi, Wiccan… etc), I think we shall all benefit from focusing more on the giving bit, rather than the consuming bit. And the first 'giving' flavor for the day? - Let us give each other, of whatever race or faith we may be, the benefit of the doubt. The benefit of our tolerance and understanding. The benefit of our compassion and mercy.  And I do not think we need a special day or event to to give voice to such humanity. Not when we are aware that everyday is a blessed day from God... 24 never-to-be-gained-again hours especially created for you and for me.

Don’t you agree, sunshine?

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, The Naqshbandi – The Prince Part 6

THE COMPANIONS OF THE PROPHET.

An animated spirit. Each one of them. Saydina Abu Bakar (ra) was famously known as the Shadow of the Prophet for the physical and spiritual closeness he has to Muhammad Habibullah(pbuh). But  I am sure that the Prophet made all his Companions feel special and relevant - And that there would always be a space under his shade and guidance for them, however their character, attitude and scruples. For although it is common to paint the Prophet Muhammad’s Companions (ra) as two-dimensional historical characters, the truth is that within each of them animated a spirited personality very much different from one another – some are quiet like Abu Bakar (after all, when did you ever hear a shadow make any sound?), others are boisterous like Umar, another can be dashing like Ali and some are the flower of modesty that is Usman. And although this is not much discussed, they don’t all necessarily get along 24/7. But however they may be towards one another, they are united by their love and loyalty to Muhammad (pbuh). And this is also why they loved and tolerated one another, because the Prophet had accepted them all, regardless.

THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY, THE NAQSHBANDI. 

I am saying this because any Sufi tariqa is a microcosm, a small universe and facsimile of the original brotherhood of the Companions. In the Sufi order we have businessmen and public servants, musicians and actors, writer and artists, we have people who go into the jungle looking for perfumed herb and woods, we have scientists and doctors doing heart surgery. We have lawyers and politicians (yes, even them! Is the shaykh not merciful?), carpet sellers, land brokers, bankers, and even a smattering of the mentally challenged (of course, some smart scoundrels will contend that we are ALL mentally challenged, we just differ in the degrees of our insanity). We also have planters, jewelers, physicists, mathematicians, cow and sheep herders. We have sportsmen and couch-potatoes. Basically, we have them all - The good, the bad and the ugly. The mureeds of the Sufi Order have to accept their fellow students, sometimes not because of their own openness and tolerance (after all, we are not perfect), but simply because the Shaykh himself accepts the most unlikely characters... so who are we to reject the companionship of a student merely because he or she does not rise to our own biased standards. People will just sigh with resignation, “Oh Shaykh… if you can accept Feisal, who are we to reject him...?”

This is the easiest thing to contemplate but the hardest thing to do. But if you can do that, if you can at least try… then please, let me kiss your hand and embrace a Mureed of Shaykh Raja Ashman. For you have honoured his memory. Ah..., but who am I to doubt? I am sure you will, each and everyone of you.

God bless your love for him, and may God forgive me because the truth is, the only person I am doubting is myself.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

The Prince Postings
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

A Friend's Dream and the Christian Greeting on the Prophet's Birthday

1. The Moon drifted over Medina

The Moon rose in Mecca,

Then a wind blew and it

Then drifted over Medina,

The Celestial Orb hovered for awhile

To then descend into the marketplaces,

Taverns, houses, bedrooms and such

Awkward places where men

Hide their hearts but show their faces.

Early in the morning, I received a call from a friend. He said, “I just woke up from a fantastic dream.” OH NO. Not another dream story. But I listened anyway –

A Friend’s Dream on Maulid ur Rasul (Prophet’s Birthday)

I awoke from my weary sleep into a waking dream, and before consciousness took me, a voice whispered into my soul… it is the Prophet’s birthday, so how do you greet 
the Morning Sun? And I cried, Alhamdulillah! Alhamdulillah! Alhamdulillah! Raising 
my hands to the sky as if to receive the bounty of the entire Universe.

Then I was brought to a place, a cemetery and at the cemetery was a simple grave and a tree stood over the tree giving it shade. Then two friends appeared before me and asked, “O’ brother, if it was the Prophet’s grave before which you now stand, 
what would you do?”

But even in my dream I was a little shy, afraid that people might think me foolish and stupid, so I hesitated. My two friends simply gazed at me and smiled, as if knowing my predicament. Well, since they may know my answer already, I replied, “I would enter the presence of the Prophet Muhammad. For I have not met him… And I dearly wish to see him.” Again and again, I repeated my answer before finally waking up.

…………………

Christian Greeting on Maulid ur Rasul

Later in the morning while having breakfast, I received a call from Major Chan. It seemed that he was on his way to church this Sunday when he decided to give me a buzz. “Good morning, brother Taufiq!” was his frantic salutations, “I just wanted to call you on this noble day, a day when the Prophet Muhammad was born, to wish you a happy Maulid ur Rasul!” He is such a sweet and thoughtful friend.

Have a beautiful Sunday, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The Garden of the Prophet in the City of Medina

238. Catacombs and Tombs

They are saying unto us,

You are worshipping Muhammad!

You are setting him as a rival unto God!

We say unto them, only this;

Stray thee not into your elders’ library

If permission was not granted to you!

Stay your hands from plucking fine

The pages, ancient and true,

Looking for reasoning

To support you!

We say unto them also;

Do not come between

Our Captains and our army,

Between our Master and our mercy,

Between His Heart and our hearts.

We do not choose,

We are chosen.

And you are not chosen?

Of course, you are!

May you excel in what the Lord

Has chosen you for!

And may the Lord forgive us

For always failing miserably

In what He has chosen for us!

So go to bed in your silent catacombs!

There are voices, music, songs,

Commandments and orders

That emanate from our tombs!

To you be your catacombs!

To us be our tombs!

Within the Raudah, the Garden Tomb of the Prophet in the Masjid Nabawi in Medina, men, women and children all come to make acquaintance with Muhammad, Most Beloved of God.

The deniers and usurpers who cloak themselves in religion have long sought to break the connection between Muhammad and his Nation. "Enough with this heresy!" They say. "He is just a man!" They tell people. Such are their protesting words rising like ghosts from the catacombs of their mind. Well, they can keep their strange ways, because happily there are still many people keeping to the traditional path, paying respects in visitation to the tombs of Prophets and Saints, some saving their money for years to pay their way.

Love guided them to thee, o' Prophet!

wa min Allah at-taufiq

A Journey from God, back to God - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 30

The gang. One last picture in Jedda.

Hullo, sunshine. This would surely be the second last posting of my umrah pilgrimage. And this time I wish to quote an extract from the pilgrimage journal. I cannot recall when I wrote it, as there are no dates, but I reckon this is the last night before me and my pilgrimage buddies made our way to Jedda to catch the flight back to Malaysia via Amman and Bangkok...

Dear God,
                Today I admitted my cowardice and habitual laziness to my friend Arjuna - How pleased was I that my December umrah was cancelled... simply because I was worried that I was not 'ready'. Not physically or spiritually. Worried that I would be a monster in Mecca, the true self being exposed to the holy air of Medina and Mecca. Nervous that You would test me... I believe in You, God, but I didn't believe You when You said that My Lovers are Mine,... My Servants are Mine, and the Traveler who travels for Me, looking for Me, is My Own to preserve and care. I didn't believe You... I couldn't.

But today, I am dying to return... to go to my Master and tell him - 'Ya Saidi (Master), I went to the Raudah (Holy Tomb of the Prophet in Medina)... and the Prophet kept his promise and loved me and preserved me... I visited the House of God (Baitullah in Mecca) and God loved me and cared for me... God and the Prophet kept their promises to me and gave me happiness, peace and contentment in my ziarah (visitation) to their houses... I am here to tell you, ya Saidi, that Ahad and Ahmad kept their promise to me and kept me safe...'

And so ends my pilgrimage journal, save for one final posting. Because you see, while I was in Mecca, a prose was recorded. And as in many prose written in Mecca, it is a sign for Love, Hope and Faith in our common Creator, a.k.a. God the All-Wonderful.

Perhaps God litters this entire world with divine clues and reminders of Him, and how better we would be if we would only open our hearts to see and listen. Life is no different from a pilgrimage after all. It is a journey from the day we were born to the day we pass away. A journey from God, back to God.

Walk with me, sunshine. And help me when I falter along the way, as I surely will.

wa min Allah at-taufiq.

Chi-Kit Teck Aun - We get this problem sometimes...

Greeting, seekers. The sinner is down with a stomach bug. Perhaps there is no sight more humbling than that of yourself shuffling in and out of the washroom in the middle of the night. I have been asleep most of the day, gratefully saved by the chinese traditional medicine 'Chi-Kit Teck Aun', a long held cure for diarrhoea.

I have a few packets with me because I brought some along during my pilgrimage. As life sometimes does, I was surprised by being in tip-top health, nay a headache, a flu or even a cold during the 2 weeks sojourn in Jerusalem, Medina and Mecca.

I would like to share something profound with you today, but my brain is still reeling. The only thing I observed is that my son refused to leave me alone all day. Even when I am just sleeping. I guess that is quite sweet of him.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Where Art Thee? - Veneration of Muhammad

Where Art Thee?
I came to your City, to your Mosque
And stood before your Maqam, o' Prophet!
And I said to your Maqam...

"People tell me Muhammad
Resides within you, and
I nod my head in agreement.
But deep in my conscience
I ask myself -
How can Muhammad be contained
Within the corners of his Maqam
When all of Creation itself
Expands and contracts with
The beating of his eternal heart?"

So I ask you now, o’ Prophet,
Where art thee?

First you are conscious a little of the Prophet's history. Then you are conscious a little of his beautiful habits and traditions. Then you become conscious a little of his presence, upon which time you lose consciousness of yourself, and see all of Creation as how God sees it, through the Mercy of Muhammad. These are beautiful thoughts fit for those who seek beauty and mercy. It is not for those who seek hate and envy, for to each, we shall find what we crave for. Thus, may God guide your hearts, in whatever faith you cloak yourself in, to seek goodness and mercy, always.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Keepsakes from Jerusalem and Medina - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 29

Maqam of Muhammad, within the holy precinct of the Masjid Nabawi, Medina.

Before I left for my Umrah Pilgrimage in end March 2011, I collected the du'a (prayers) that my friends and family desired that I ask in the holy mosques of the Masjidil Haram (Mecca), Masjid Nabawi (Medina) and Masjidil al-Aqsa (Jerusalem). I wrote it all in a little black journal which accompanied me on that beautiful journey. Typically, my elder brother, Saiful, was the last to pass me his du'a, which he wrote on a rough paper. That too I inserted into my book and when the time finally arrived that I was in the precinct of the Prophet's Maqam (tomb), I recited his words -

Ya Rasulullah, Peace and Blessings be upon you, your family and upon your noble companions.

Ya Mustafa, the Chosen One, the Servant of Mercy, sent by the All-Merciful to guide us back to our Lord,we ask you for your succour and support for the Hour is drawing ever closer, lest we be the lost ones, denied the sight and presence of Saidina Mahdi and Saidina Isa, Peace be upon them both.

Forgive us, Allah, for the sake of Your Beloved who rests now here, grant us this honour for the sake of Your Chosen One, that he may greet us at the Pool of Khawtar with happiness, well-pleased with us, and You, ya Allah, well-pleased with us.

Amin

A beautiful prayer, yes? My brother writes quite well, I think. It is easy to write when you write with sincerity.

In between the pages I also came across this little olive branch which I stole from the olive tree that grows closest to the entrance of the Maqam of Rabia (the famous female Sufi saint) on top Mount Olive in Jerusalem. I am not sure what to do with it now. But it is a keepsake, like all the memories of a sinner in pilgrimage.

Thank you, sunshine, for allowing me to share these memories with you. God bless your warm fuzzy hearts.

wa min Allah at-taufiq.

The Perfume of the Angel of Death and a Night of Dread- Umrah Pilgrimage Part 26

However I tried Photoshop-ing this picture, I still look fat.
Then a disembodied voice whispered, "Try going on diet."

This is a continuation of my report on my Umrah Pilgrimage which took me to Jerusalem, Medina and Mecca in end March to early April this year. My last posting was about food on 22nd July 2011 entitled Dead Camel and Dhab Lizard, Guava and Zam-Zam - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 25 (Click Here). The journal continues on Wednesday, 30th March 2011.

PERFUME OF DEATH. There are a couple of things which is mandatory to be purchased in Mecca, and one of them is perfume. It can be very, very cheap or extremely expensive. I was at one particular stall when I saw a man sniffing away, and pleasurably commented, "Hmm, very nice, Haji..." To which the proprietor said, "Yaa... masyaAllah, this is scent is called the Malaikat Subuh (Angel of Dawn)!" The man then asked, "Good, good... but do you have perfume of the Malaikatulmaut (Angel of Death)?" The old shopkeeper looked offended and did not reply, although in his face I could see his thoughts... "Crazy, crazy Malaysians."

Journal extract

Talking about crazy Malaysians... During one of the many times we chilled in Mecca, a friend confided in me his night of dread - My friend is a particular man with a particular taste for the night life. One night in Indonesia he was out partying when one of the girls overdosed on some heavy 'shit'. They hurried her to the hospital and fortunately she was saved. But while waiting outside and smoking, he felt an overwhelming sense of shame and confusion, wondering who he is actually, why is he here and what is his purpose, and oh boy, what if the girl actually dies? Musing sullenly about his present circumstances, a cat walked by and he found himself asking, "Oh my God! Will this be the last cat I shall ever see in my life?!" He hurried off to find a mosque and found a small one nearby, but it was closed. He climbed over the fence anyway, completed his ablutions (wuduq - physical and spiritual cleansing with water pre-prayers) and started praying, all the time asking God to allow him to complete the prayers, beseeching God not to take away his life before he can complete each recitation, gesture and movement in his prayers. Now in hindsight, I think he was a little OD-ed himself.

I don't think you need to do serious drugs to OD. People can overdose and lose themselves in anything. It is wise to take everything in moderation. Perhaps even in what people consider to be the pursuit for spiritual excellence. After all... 'excellence' and 'spiritual' by whose definition? Find a spiritual master, become a pupil (a good one, not like me!) and you will not have to travel your path alone. You need not face the Enemy alone...

136. The Enemy

Wine for the mind,

Ghouls and wraiths,

Honey for money,

Face and faith,

Whatever your passion,

He has your poison.

May you have a moderately satisfying day, sunshine.

The Eagles of the Kaaba.

Pax Taufiqa.

Pigeons and Ice Creams in Mecca - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 23



Some chaps in Mecca are deeply concerned about my health, and they would grunt loudly, "Haram! Haram!" (Forbidden! Forbidden!) as I enjoyed my cigarettes in the Holy City. In my high spiritual state of my pilgrimage, I would reply (in my head), "O' my brother... thank you for your concerns, but please, just shove it."



In my earlier posting, I think I mentioned that pigeons are always about in holy places. So this little fella must be the cousin of the birds I made acquaintance with in Jerusalem and Medina. It is cooing outside the window sill of our cramped quarters. He must be thinking, "Why is this pilgrim in his room while the faithful are making their steadfast way to the Masjidil Haram?" I hate pigeons, they are such nosy-parkers.



Wonderful, mad, chaotic Mecca. Even in the throng of humanity and God-awful diesel fumes of the big buses and SUVs that clog the streets, you are often moved to sit. To find a spot and simply contemplate and reflect.



What an ornate door, I thought. This is the old part of Mecca with tiny alley ways and small little townhouses jostling for room with mini-hotels, kebab shops, laundrettes, watch stores and jewellery shops. Looming over the old city is the new development sitting on the hill directly adjacent to the Masjidil Haram. Starbucks within 100 meters!

Continuation of Umrah Journal in Mecca…
- Umrah feeling – tried to recall what I learnt about prophet’s life pre-hijra (before his migration to Medina) – then it dawn (on me) the love for this mad chaotic city and its people - It is a mess and I am not surprised that the Jews and Christians were so shocked to even consider that a prophet can come from such people – but they have BIG HEARTS in their cunning and hard-working ways…

- spent time Monday morning – woke up early at 6 am after just 3 hours sleep – Just wanted to have a fag outside but wandered (the city) and bumped into Syful (my loyal companion in Medina) – we walked around and shopped for a couple of hours – and we talked about Nabi + Mecca + Hajja Amina Adil + her Beautiful book about the Prophet …

- Tuesday 10am – Visited Kaaba early morning / midnight. Said sorry for being cocky (see Posting entitled "Standing in front of the Holy Kaaba and thinking 'Hmm. Not so big after all.' - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 22" Click Here) the morning before – (Imagined) it answered “That’s okay, Taufiq. I knew you were grumpy and boy, were you tired that night! And after all, I never asked you to love me…”

The Kaaba is right, of course. It never asked to be adored. And Mecca also never asked to be adored. But the longer I stayed, the more I fell in love with the place. For wherever I am in the city, I cannot contain my emotion thinking, "He was born here. He lived, breathed, worked and married here to Khadijah the First. And it was here that one auspicious day he returned to his beloved wife and confessed to her that while doing seclusion, Gabriel the Arch Angel came unto him with a message from God."

Have a wonderful day, sunshine. God bless you.

Pax Taufiqa

Medina is all about Muhammad and his Nation - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 21

I visited the Prophet at the Raudah (‘the Garden’ to denote the resting place of Muhammad, prophet of God at his mosque in Medina) a couple of times over the four days I was in Medina, and mostly at night. There is in fact a whole chapter on the Adab (the beautiful manners) of visiting the Raudah, which was later given to me by my friend, Syful. But for the first couple of visits I was on my own with my feelings,... and how my feelings found strange expressions in the Arabian nights.

Medina is all about the Prophet...

And his Nation...

"O' my Prophet", we said, "O’ my Nation", he replied
O’ my Prophet,
You are the Sun of my sun,
O’ my Nation,
You are the moon of my Moon,
You are the Light of my light,
You are the eye of my Eye,
You are the Truth of my truth,
You are the sky of my Sky,
You are the Hu of my Hu,
You are the i of my I,

O’ my Prophet,
You are the Sea of my sea,
O’ my Nation,
You are the lake of my Lake,
You are the dream in my Wake,
You are the Tears of my tears,
You are the Smile of my smile,
You are the joy of my Joy,
In all of my Years.

O’ my Prophet,
You are the Hope of my hope,’
O’ my Nation,
You are the kiss of my Kiss,
You are the Breath of my breath,
You are the peace of my Peace,
You are the Soul of my soul,
You are the good to my Good,
You are the flame in my Night,
That has never grown cold.

O’ my Prophet,
You are the rain of my Rain,
O’ my Nation,
You are the Pearl of my pearl,
You are the Heart of my heart,
You are the being in my Being,
You are the sea to my Shore,
The rise of my Sleep,
The path to my Door
The road to my Keep.

O’ my Prophet,
You are the Spring of my spring,
O’ my Nation,
You are the sting of my Sting,
You are the Strength of my strength,
You are the Sword in my sheath,
You are the Grace of my grace,
The Praise in my praise.

O’ my Prophet,
You are the Stone of my stone,
O’ my Nation,
You are the earth of my Earth,
You are the Salt of my tears,
You are the eternity of my Forever,
You are the Water in my ocean,
You are the Treasure of my Passion,
You are the hope above all Hopes,
You are my answers to the Lord,
When He asks me this question…,

“O’ Muhammad,
What is the greatest gift
You have ever received?”

And I reply,

“It is my Nation,
It is your Mercy,
It is Me.”

I am glad I managed to finish this poem. It has been burning a beautiful bloom upon my back, and I weary of carrying it alone. The writing commenced at 11.15am on the 26th March 2011 in Medina and finally finished just last night. So now it is written and it is out here.

Thank you, sunshine. For allowing me to share the burden of my happiness and madness with you.

Pax Taufiqa.

Medina and the Chapter Ya Sin - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 20

WHAT A PITY. One of the first emotions which I crossed my heart when I gazed upon the gilded entrance into the actual tomb of the Prophet was “He looks caged… What a pity.” Later that night while chilling with my companion, Afizan, he also voiced the same feelings – “I don’t know, but when I gazed before the Raudah, I felt pity – that he is visited by thousands upon thousands of his followers each hour of the day, yet he looks imprisoned behind in the Raudah (Literally means ‘the Garden’ and denotes the resting place of the Prophet inside his mosque, Masjid Nabawi).” I thought I was the only one feeling such emotion, but I guess I am not alone.

EASILY PLEASED. While I was sitting by the pavement on my first day in Medina, suddenly a young arab youth sat next to me and asked to borrow my lighter. He said “How are you, brother?” It was a greeting which he obviously thought little of, but to me it meant everything. Finally, a local of the City of the Prophet greeted me as a guest. He then said thank you and left me to my contentment. It doesn’t take much to please me. Not in Medina especially.

CHAPTER YA SIN, VERSE NO. 82. I spent a lot of time in Medina with a room mate whom I call Arjuna. He is a sincere person, charming, energetic and has lived an interesting life though he isn’t very old. In one of our many chats, he had this to share. “I have a teacher of the Tarikat (Sufi Order) in Indonesia. And one day he told me that in the Chapter Ya Sin of the Holy Quran, in particular verse No.82, the bit where it goes “…kun fayakoon…”, it means that God says “kun!” and the Prophet replies “…fayakoon!” Below is the actual verse in Arabic Script and as translated by Abdullah Yusuf Ali.

Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is!
(Innama amruhu itha aradashay-an an yaqoola lahu kun fayakoonu)

So in summary, what the Sufi teacher is trying to say is that all happenings in Creation from the Year-Minus-Zero till now occurred and is still occuring upon God saying “Be” and the Muhammad replying “And it is!”.

I nodded my head appreciatively, “Cool, cool... I never heard that one before.”, and thereafter kept my silence. Later that night however I remembered our conversation and wrote it down in my journal. For me, it was the best thing so far that I have received in Medina. A third bundle came in the form of a poem to a sinner as he made his solitary walk back from his midnight soiree at the Raudah. And that prose shall be in my next posting about the pilgrimage. But for now I leave you with a little poem recorded some 7 years back, ‘the Nabee’ here meaning the Prophet, Muhammad...

38. Make Me Pretty
o' Lord,
If I am a gift to the Nabee,
Then wrap me up in Your Beauty.

Powder my nose with discretion,
Shade my eyes with compassion,
Scent my breath with remembrance,
Colour my lips with conviction,
Lighten my brow with humility,
And comb my hair with chivalry.

Have a lovely day, sunshine. God bless you.

Pax Taufiqa.

The Sinner & the Phoenix - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 19

THE FIREBIRD. The mythical firebird known as the Phoenix exists in perhaps all great civilizations across the globe. This flaming pigoen appears in Persian, Greek, Roman, Egyptian, Japanese and Chinese lore. This bird is like the dragon (and also the Green Man) who appears to make their appearances in the most unlikely (and unconnected) of folklores and traditional beliefs. Where there is smoke there is fire they say (well, unless its dry ice!). But we are not here to delve into the story of the mythical Phoenix, interesting as it may be. For you see, during his pilgrimage the sinner was accompanied by his very own Phoenix too, albeit of the wooden sort. Below is a picture of my own firebird (sans beak)...KING OF SAINTS. I purchased my Phoenix walking stick from my good buddy Ahmad Alatas from Indonesia. I asked him what sorta bird whose head crowns the cane. He said it was the Rajawali bird. In Malay that means the King of Saints (or the Saint King). I chuckled thinking that I would need all the help I can get as I begin my pilgrimage, and what better help for a sinner than a saint? And a King of Saints at that! Later, I found out that Rajawali is the Malay name for the mythical Phoenix.

BROKEN BEAK. Alas, even before arriving in Jerusalem I must have accidentally dropped my Phoenix, and a bit of the upper beak was broken. Distraught (and rather tired) I resolved to just dump the bally thing in Queen Alia Airport, Jordan. But my buddy, Ariffin, advised me not to, and to at least keep it until we reach Medina. There, he said, you can leave it at Masjid Nabawi (the Prophet's Mosque). Reluctantly, I agreed.

And so my Phoenix accompanied me all day and night for the entire 14 days of my pilgrimage. It followed me into the Masjidil Aqsa and Rabia's shrine in Jerusalem, Moses's shrine along the way to Jericho, to the Prophet's Raudah (Garden) in the Masjid Nabawi in Medina, and finally, when I performed the tawaf (the 7 circumambulation around the Holy Kaaba, Mecca), it was there with me, my support and constant companion. Rarely was I ever without my Phoenix. And rarely did I not drop it, so that when it came to the last day in Mecca a friend of mine suggested, "Taufiq, if we stay just a couple more days here, I reckon not only will your bird be beakless, it will be headless." And I think he is right.

I HIT SOMEONE IN FRONT OF THE HOLY KAABA. Well, I never did leave the cane in Masjid Nabawi. I have grown too fond of its ugly and broken beak, and the crease and carving of its head have become familiar in my hands. Initially, I was worried that perhaps the guards in the two great mosques in Medina and Mecca might not take kindly to a pilgrim lugging a walking stick depicting an animal (in strict Wahabbi regulation - I do not think it is actually permissable). But nobody stopped me, nobody questioned me, even when I was raising the Phoenix's head high amongst the masses of pilgrims circumambulating the Holy Kaaba. I didn't want to accidentally hit someone's legs or body, you see - And this is the embarassing bit - because I did in fact hit someone's head - the head belonged to a poor Turkish lady, and I accidentally hit her when an idiot behind me nudged my elbow. Wait, wait... It wasn't a hard knock really, so don't judge me. Maybe it was a divine intervention because she was thinking some impure thoughts? Hehehe. Okaaay... I am just kidding!

Well, such is life. Go to the Holy Kaaba, and you get beaned by a sinner.

Have a nice day, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa.

Into His Embrace I Fall, Dying in Someone Else's Dream

Into His Embrace I Fall
Muhammad is my master, my captain
And the messenger sent to me
By God to teach me about Love.
So his mecca is now my mecca,
His medina my medina,
His companions mine,
his family my family,
And his concerns
My concerns.

He is the root through which
I drink the strength of the earth
Beneath my feet,

He is the trunk and branch by which
I stretch my hands towards God,

He is the beautiful blooms
That are my children,

And when autumn comes
He is the leaves that
Blanket the earth,
Where I gently lay down my love,
All my kisses and sighs.

And when life ebbs
From my withered limbs,
It is into his embrace I fall,
Closing my eyes for the last time,
To the birds, to the trees and the skies.

On Thursday night, I took myself away from company and listened to music. I do not know why, but I started recalling all my friends, old and new that I made during my Umrah Pilgrimage. Accompanied by no one but Beyonce's song, Halo, I started to write the above prose. It was my first poem since I came back from the Holy Lands, about 1 month ago. I sent it out via sms to a couple of my companions on the pilgrimage. Some responded but others didn't, no doubt wondering, "What the...?" Hehehe.

One Friday morning I arrived in the office and Ani said that last night she dreamt I died. She said that in her dream, me and Ariffin came back from a meeting, and she saw that I looked very tired. The next thing, she was already at home when she received the news on her cellphone that alas, her boss have passed away. She said many people attended the funeral. I wonder who they were?

Compound of the Dome of the Rock, March 2011

We should live our lives to the fullest. After all, who knows when we might die... even in someone else's dream.

Have a perfectly lively Sabbath, sunshine. After 1 day of blogspot downtime, I am glad to be back.

Pax Taufiqa

Suleiman and Saladin in Medina - Umrah Pilgrimage Part 18

FOOD & FAG. On the 23rd March 2011, I was still in Medina, the City of the Prophet. That was the 3rd day of my pilgrimage and my cache of cigarettes was reaching dangerously low level. So I decided to walk the city to look for food and fags. Later that evening I came back, and I recounted the day's event in an sms to Heche (which I happily saved in my phone for prosperity). The sms told a story...

"I like wandering alone. Found myself at d other end (of the Masjid Nabawi - the Prophet's Mosque) at the clock tower, and behind one building was a open-air food court (It was full of pilgrims from Indonesia, Bangladesh and Pakistan as well as a large crowd of Kurds and Arabs). I had briani rice with chicken (wuu Huu!). Fella next to me was sulaiman from Kurdistan. I said, 'Me from Malaysia'...'Belorussia?' he responded. Hehehehe. We spoke about the geopolitical situation in Iran, Iraq and Turkey which surrounds his country. Also spoke at length about Salahuddin al-Ayubi (Saladin), conqueror of Jerusalem - who was a Kurdish, "just like me", Suleiman reminded me. And he spoke to me all in Kurdistan-arabic. 3 days in Medina and I am already multilingual... Hehehe. Oh, yes. He also said that he was a 'Qadiriya' sufi, and we both agreed that he was a 'dervish'. I don't know how he knew the word 'dervish' out of all the English vocabulary. After all, the only other English words I was able to discern from Suleiman was Yes, No and Okay. Hehehe."

HARAM! HARAM! Although successful in procuring food, the sinner however abjectly failed to find cigarettes - my shy inquiries often being rebuffed with a gruff "Haram! Haram!" (Forbidden! Forbidden!) reaction from the locals. "Lighten up, will you?", I asked churlishly in my head, walking away disappointed and slighted. (I know, pet. You worry about my smoking addiction. You gotta give me time, until then, I am not blind to the truth, that...)

150. Dunhill
You are blinded by the plumes of smoke
From the fire that you yourself stoke.

I HAVE A CUNNING PLAN... Only later did I confirm my worse fears - that although you are permitted to smoke in the Holy Land of Medina (and Mecca too), nobody is permitted to trade in the cancer stick within the holy sanctuary. So you can only legally buy a pack of Marlboro Light (my preferred nicotine plug) outside the Holy Land territory, which is about 25 minutes drive from the hotel. "Oh yeah?!" I mused, my fiendish mind already hatching a cunning plan to break Saudi law and find cigarettes before my last pack runs out. But that is a story for another posting, sunshine.

Had a sunny Sunday, sunshine?

Its broiling hot here in Kuala Lumpur.

Pax Taufiqa.