THE GARDEN OF PRAYER & THE ENDURING SALAWAT - The Ramadan Story, Part 8

O' Prophet, if I could, I would

If I could wrap myself around you, I would,

Like a ring of gold and silver

On your little finger,

To mark our engagement

And long-sought union...

Or like a humble black string

A little forget-me-not,

Tied with the Knot of God

By you, o' Master...

I am saying all this because

I don't know what else to say,

Your love, your beauty and mercy

Confound my words

Day after day after day...

........................

Double Assurance. Is there a place better than this for us, o' Muslims? On one hand, you can praise God Almighty with beautiful praises, and the Prophet will undoubtedly say, "This thing that you say and do, this is good!" On the other hand, you can also venerate and plead for glorious blessings from God for the Prophet (s.a.w.s.), and God too will say, "This thing that you say and do, this is good!" It is a double divine assurance. A back to back warranty that you are in a good place and heading to a better place.

The Garden of Prayer & Praise. And however you sincerely sing Allah's (s.w.t.) absolute praises and venerate Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) - there is simply no full-stop to your inspiration or veneration. Your every breath is there to magnify God Almighty and His Beloved (s.a.w.s.), your every gesture, movement and thought can become a Garden of Prayer. And in such a place, you become the gardener, the tiller, the seed, the bloom, the flower and the fruit! Perhaps your only worry is the average life-expectancy in your country. For you are blessed with the certainty that however hard you try, till your voice is raised by the Angels to the heavenly sky, no amount of prayer or praise will suffice to mirror His Love... Leaving you ultimately gasping for words...  

May the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) be surrounded by his garden of praise, from one invisible horizon to the other invisible horizon. Is this life not well-lived already if we have perished only to be a flower in such a garden? Amidst an infinite bloom of salawats showered upon him already by Allah (s.w.t.) Himself and His Host of Angels? 

Lo! Allah and His angels shower blessings on the Prophet.
O ye who believe! Ask blessings on him and salute him
with a worthy salutation! (Quran 33:56 Marmaduke Pickthall)

Compensating for Sincerity? On a final note, I might add that it doesn't matter if you are not a wordsmith or a poet, that you cannot string two eloquent words  together to save your life. For it is the sincerity of the speaker that really matters, not the words themselves. And I guess I go overboard textually because I am compensating for my lack of sincerity? Perhaps this is okay... after all, you cannot spell sincerity without sin.

And in each breath, our journey is just beginning. 

Have a lovely day, sunshine, and a blessed fast.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Dawn & Dusk, The Virtue of Constancy - Monday blues after a long holiday

Dawn & Dusk

Dawn and dusk,

Day and night,

Right and wrong,

Black and white,

Twice a day and

Many, many more times

In our lives,

We cross the line between

What the Good Lord enjoins

And what our ego enjoys.

..............

Sincerity is natural enough sometimes when it is spurred by regret and passion. Consistency in sincerity is much, much harder. I think our One God puts it best...

By (the Token of) Time (through the ages),

Verily Man is in loss,

Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy. (Quran 103:1-3, translations by Yusuf Ali)

After a good four days' break to the northern state of Perlis for a wedding, I awoke today a little unprepared for my regular Monday routine. Fortunately I have left tokens of work to be completed scattered about to remind me - in my bedroom, in my bag, in my car, on my work table, in my cellphone and less visible sometimes, in my head. And there are of course a mound of emails in my inbox left there by my clients and Alexander (my partner in crime).

In the Surah al-Asr, the very final lesson that we are asked to enjoin each other is constancy. And I reckon it's because we can be very, very honest sometimes, we can be exceedingly patient some times, but to carry both with constancy is the true measure of the human spirit.

So you are lucky, sunshine, that you only get me through this blog. I do not think I am an easy man to live with. On a daily diet of Taufiq, you may find me just a little bit too much. If there is talk of sincerity, patience and honesty in this almanac, it is not mine, rather it is about those who keep close to me and tolerate me.

See, this is me being honest and sincere. May we share and heighten our understanding, that such virtue becomes a more common place occurrence in our daily life. For it is perhaps too uncommon for me.

Oh well. Have a great Monday anyway, sunshine... because however it begins, the day can only get better. If anything, that is the singular enduring belief that I always nurture in my sinful heart. Sinners are like that. We have to be, to face this world with some optimism. He he he. Hu... Hu... Hu...

Angel: Where is this enduring optimism of yours this Monday morning,  o' mortal?
Me: Just bring me my cup of coffee and I will show you!

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

My mother defines my meaning of success

My mother, circa 1973-75

10. Heart Surgery II

We associate to mend hearts,

Not argue theology.

So let us not quibble on dogma

And leave such pastimes

To those bewitched with religion.

Unbearable Me. So we are here because we need a little help. A little emergency heart procedure. Something to heal our broken heart and dreams, our addiction to ......{please fill in your poison here - drugs, alcohol, money, cigarettes, Louis Vuitton, etc}..., and to cure ourselves from our own intolerance, hatred, bigotry, sloth, wastefulness, envy and the rest of our very human failings which makes life difficult and makes us unbearable to be with. You know, sometimes we find our own company unbearable. I do.  

Religion. I find the religion of Islam fascinating. Of course, I am undoubtedly bias, but this is who I am, and this is how I have been brought up, and it is merely Providence that have sprinkled interesting and inspiring personalities in my life to push me this way. I never sought spirituality, and never really cared much about the Afterlife. My main concern was finding happiness here and now. I was never too interested in suffering in this world for a post-death gratification once I am dead and buried.  

I do not think that Islam is like that anyway. For in our regular prayers, we are always asking God for success (and safety) in this life and in the Hereafter. For me that is a dream worth chasing, don't you think?

But what is Succcess? Of course, there is a little grey area because words are open to interpretation - What tantamount to success in this life? A house? A studio apartment? 2 children? 10 children? A car? 100 cars even? A summer house in the French Riviera? A butler? A personal trainer? USD 5 billion in an offshore bank account?

My late mother. I think we can be poor but contented or rich but desperately unhappy. Well, that is what my mother's life has taught me. My mum chose to seek happiness in her heart. By being nice. To everyone, whether you are the Prime Minister's wife, or the garbage man that daily took our household rubbish away. She took time to live life and enjoy God's blessings. She took time to be part of charitable organisations, and on her own, in secret, doing her personal bit for the unfortunate. Not just those in the big city, but deep into the hinterlands of my country. At the same time she maintained a rich tapestry of friendship with friends and family all over the world. And through it all, she still had time for my father, my two brothers and me. So I guess, to me, my mother is a good definition of Success.

Of course, my mum is not perfect. But I have no doubt that in everything that she did, she did it all with patience and sincerity. And I think that was the key to her success. I do not think that God is asking us for more than that. After all, He made us and above anyone else, He understand our strengths and weaknesses. But I think God especially loves my mother for her unassuming and unpretentious nature. This is just a guess, mind you.  

Have a beautiful day, sunshine. Let us love, love, love our mothers.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam.

Love will show the Way.

Get a job! says Rumi - The Appearance of Duality and the Reality of Oneness

2. On the Scale of al-Amin II

O’ seeker, be sincere,

Do not use our secrets

To make you negligent of your worldly duties,

Nor to put obstacles in your worldly affairs.

As Mevlana Rumi once said,

Worldliness is only forgetting God,

It is not having a family or goods.

And seeker,

There is nothing more worldly than insincerity!

NO EXCUSES. I know the form. They say such and such work is not for them because it will affect their piety. And they dither and wait for the 'perfect work' to come knocking at their doorstep. And all the while the world is moving and they are left behind. A couple of years ago a friend stepped in and gave me the advice inscribed in the prose above. "Don't use religion to excuse your laziness and procrastination!" He said. I try to follow his advice, not always successfully. 

SPIRITUAL AFFAIRS? WORLDLY AFFAIRS? It is all the same to me now. I met my friend again today and this is what he now confides in me- "Well, you know... I hardly knew you back then. But I guess by now you know that worldly or spiritual, it is in truth one path and one issue at stake. It is only thus distinguished because God in His Most Incredible Creativity simply chooses to sprinkle worldly physical dusts on the matters which pertain to our material world, and spiritual heavenly dusts on our spiritual affairs."

THE APPEARANCE OF DUALITY. But the appearance of duality in what is spiritual and temporal, between what is material and intangible is to me only just that - Appearances. And appearances can often be deceiving. I do not wished to be deceived any longer... Even if at times I can still be insincere.

Have a lovely Friday, sunshine. Thank you for dropping by.

wa min Allah at-taufiq.

Just another Love Letter to God - Prose of Ramadhan Part 67

My Lord is Love (Ramadhan Verses 34)
My Lord is Love,
And He has many lovers,
Not a moment does He tire
In His Loving Labour.

My Lord is Love,
And He has infinite hands,
Not a moment does He waver
In His Divine Plan.

My Lord is Love,
And everything is His dominion,
Not a moment does He dither
In attending to His creation.

My Lord is Love,
And He is the Constant Friend,
Not a moment is He deaf
To His lovers’ lament.

My Lord is Love
And He is Most Pleasing,
Not a moment does He tire
Of His lovers’ flirting.

My Lord is Love
And there is nothing to fear
But losing His Love,

Yet His Love is forever…

So now is the clincher - 
Is your love for Him as enduring
And as sincere?

Of course the answer is no (for a lot of people). We are like little grains of sand blown by the upheavals of our conscience in our never-ending struggle with our ego. We don't always think of God. We are busy with living and breathing. Chasing datelines, getting married, waiting for a Big Mac at the neighbourhood MacD. I don't blame you. I too often forget God. When I get mad at people and inanimate things (I am a specialist at that last bit, ask Heche). When I despair of my fortune. When I come across re-runs of Barney the Dinasour.

I sit still a lot nowadays. When sorrow or anger is washing across my subconsciousness, I try not to react ('try' being the definitive word here). It is easiest when I am alone. Then I would just wait for the flood to abate. And then, just like right now, I would write.

Since I cannot be right all the time, I write. It's a form of free-therapy, I guess. So thank you for being my unpaid psychiatrist. Hehehe. At the end of the day, we may not be 100% sincere, and we are a handful for God to handle. But as the prose above goes, God's hands are infinite... so it is only right that we are a handful!

May God bless you, sunshine. And may God bless this wonderful world He has created with Love.

wa min Allah at-taufiq.

Money, Good Friends, Closet Sufis and the Angelic Audience

Look at him! His impudence is really too much. Writing as if he can see us!

260. Selling my words

For two days already,

I have been selling my words,

For glasses of tea and packets of cigarettes.

I feel a little guilty,

But not enough

To feel shame.

What a brigand and a bum am I!

And how glad am I to be one!

For what we steal and speak of

Cause Angels themselves to pause and sit in!

Now if only I can find a way to charge

These Angelic audiences…

A FRIEND IN NEED. ME. I was a little broke for a couple of days. But I still like having my chai at the neighbourhood Indian Muslim restaurant. So being the pragmatic and unprincipled rogue that I am, I simply went through my little black book and called up old friends that I have not seen in a while. Often they would not only pay for my cups of tea, they would also cover my meal, and sometimes even my fags (cigarettes). I am incorrigible, I know.

THE CRAZY ONES. My favourite collection of friends are the crazy ones. Well, not actually insane, but the sort that I could be truly honest with, especially in the topic of religion, spirituality, love, God, Prophets and saints. They tend to be humble, but most of all never boring and always funny, often making themselves the brunt of their own jokes. Some people call them Sufis. They deny it of course, but I can see through their pretensions of not being Sufis. They are rarely judgmental. Sometimes I can have a huge chip on my shoulder, a fuming volcano of dissatisfaction about something or someone. I would talk to them and with empathy, they would pop my balloon of anger / envy / jealousy. These are the sort of friends that EVERYONE should have. They won't allow you to wallow in your pit of negativity. And they certainly are not those who would make things worse by goading your ego. With a smile and a gentle hand on  your shoulder they would make you see that the world is in truth beautiful, all things are happening as they are fated to, and God is always smiling upon us. With my hand on my heart, I wish upon you such good friends. Amen.

THEM ANGELS. I have no doubt that the Angels are listening in. But sadly I am unable to cadge anything from them. After all, they don't drink, eat or sleep. And I don't think they smoke. There is absolutely no point to ask them for anything. But maybe they can put in a good word for me with  THE FRIEND OF FRIENDS... aka God.

Have a friendful day, sunshine! 

Pax Taufiqa.

The Essence of Ikhlas and Sincerity - All's Well that Ends Well

IKHLAS. ‘Ikhlas’ is originally an Arabic word meaning sincerity although there are a some other definitions of the word which are alluded to by writers. In the context of the Malay language it has been adopted to mean sincerity. In the context of the al Quran, there is a surah al-Ikhlas which is often referred to as the TAWHID verse (Verse of Unity) which is one of the greatest verses (Verse No.112) of the book referring to the absolutely utter Uniqueness and Oneness of God.

IKHLAS IN COMMERCE. In my culture however, the word has grown into a non-commercial phrase utilized in commercial contexts. In the olden days, and still occurring now, some transaction between us are still established on the basis of Ikhlas. For example, there may be a village ustaz (religious teacher) who teaches the reading of the Al-Quran to the village kids, and sometimes, when the parents were to ask the ustaz how much is his teaching fee, the ustaz would say, “Ikhlas sahaja, encik…” meaning – "with honesty, sir, how much do you wish to give me in good grace and absolute sincerity?” In the uncertain economic climate of a village (and indeed now, a city), this method of fixing the price of his teaching helps especially the poor, who can only give a certain amount, which doesn’t correlate with the parent’s own idea of how the true value of his teaching – because really, it is difficult to fix value upon the priceless knowledge of being able to recite the holy scriptures. It is a beautiful arrangement, and an honourable proposition, allowing both parties to maintain their face and most importantly, allowing children of the poor the opportunity to learn to read the holy book. Apart from Quran lessons, I have also experienced it being used to quantify pricing of traditional massages, healing and herbal concoctions, and also in one-off transactions which sometimes occur, say when you want to reward a passer-by who helped you to change your flat tyre.

THE ESSENCE OF THE IKHLAS PROPOSITION. The Ikhlas method is commonly used not just in traditional transactions, but sometimes in the highest level of commercial and corporate transaction. And this is the reason why – Because assuming you are the service provider, and the client queries you how much he should pay, when you say, “Ikhlas apa you nak kasi…” (With sincerity, just give me what you think I deserve) to the client, you are in fact placing a high level of respect to him. You are making the assumption that he has a clear grasp of the value of your service, and if the amount is much smaller than you anticipated, you cannot without losing your self-respect, protest and ask for a higher sum. Indeed, if you DO protest, it would indicate that you yourself are not so totally ikhlas and sincere in making the proposition to him.

SERIOUSLY? THAT IS YOUR LEVEL OF SINCERITY? My friend recently was caught in such a dilemma with a client. In my estimation, he was only compensated 2% of the market value of his services to a client, and this already being discounted because the client was his friend. When we met, my friend was literally fuming with indignation and disappointment and I too felt the same way.

IKHLAS ISN’T SO EASY AFTER ALL. So you see, the test of sincerity in an Ikhlas proposition cuts both ways. If the customer is so callous or ignorant of the value of service rendered by my friend, he fails. And my friend too in a way failed, because his sincere proposal to the customer to just name his fee was accompanied with unspoken expectations. I say ‘in a way failed’ because we do not live in a vacuum of experience and expectations, and I must say that my friend went beyond the call of duty in providing expert and very sincere service to his customer. The service, if the customer wanted to, could have easily been quantified in terms of his profit or escape from losses.

A MECCAN PRAYER ANSWERED. But don’t feel too bad for my friend. This chap is very sincere, and when he accompanied me on my Umrah pilgrimage last March, this was what he asked God in his prayers, “You know, Taufiq” He said. “People ask for all sorts of things when they are here in Mecca. They ask for money, they ask for children, they ask for health and success in their job or business. But this time around (He has been to Mecca many, many times) I asked God simply for Ikhlas. To be able to be sincere with myself, with people around me, and most importantly with God and His Beloved Prophet, Muhammad Habibullah…”

ALL’S WELL THAT ENDS WELL. So I guess the episode described above is just one milestone in his journey to becoming Ikhlas and sincere. And as a friend, I am happy he has passed one important station of his path. May God bless him, and may God bless his customer too, without whom this posting wouldn’t even have been realized.

See how things all work out for the better? When you are ikhlas and sincere?

God bless you, sunshine. May you bask in the glory and subtle beauty of Ikhlas-Sincere.

Pax Taufiqa.

Footnote – On this happy ending, I would like to link an old song entitled ‘Ikhlas Tapi Jauh’ (Sincere but Distant) sung by our local stars, Zainal Abidin, Sheila Majid and Zubir Ali. This must have been recorded sometime in the late 80s or early 90s.

The Good Sinner

I always wanted to be a good believer. Whenever life became uncertain and unhappy, I always said to myself – "Taufiq, old’ boy. Maybe you should try to be a good believer". When I recall my life, it happened on four distinctive occasions.

I was 13 years old. I don’t know why, but I felt I needed more structure and order in my life. I even wanted my parents to send me to a residential school (which is quite funny really because I dropped out of one not more than a year before). Well, my mother said no, so I started to pray more instead. But the religion and its rituals did not suit my taste back then. Guided simply by ordinary religious books, Islam failed to titillate my taste buds and soon I got bored.

I was 18 years old. I was in college and I guess I was impressed by the kindness and discipline of some of my friends. Essentially, they can be broken into 4 parties. First, the non-affliated groups who had no interest in joining any recognized group of Muslim students. The other 3 were the PAS affiliated chaps (PAS is the biggest Muslim faith based political party in Malaysia), the Abim boys (kinda pro-government Muslim movement popular amongst college and university students) and finally the famous Tabligh guys (the Muslim missionary movement started in the Indian subcontinent and whose name is derived from one of the Prophet’s 4 essential characteristic meaning ‘to transmit / to inform’). I tried to change my sinful ways but none of the groups however piqued my curiosity and certainly not enough to drag my attention away from my No.1 curiosity (or you can call it obsession, to be brutally honest here), which was, of course, girls. I was never in co-ed school, you see. So being in close proximity with these lovely and graceful creatures consumed my waking and sleeping hours. I was besotted, so not much movement on the God front at this point in time, although I did try (a little).

I was 22 years old and studying in the UK. I had a brief moment of trying to be holy but again, neither praying nor books I found in the Islamic Centre library really kept my attention. I was more interested in cooking, British morning television ('Ann & Nick'), the game of Snooker, and once again, girls. Am I never to be ‘holy?

Finally at the age of 34, I decided to drop in on a Sufi Tarikat franchise situated (conveniently) just about 5 minutes walk from my house - And life has never been quite the same since. Oh, there is absolutely no change in me. I am not holy at all and still keep to my habitual cursing and sinning. Why, only yesterday evening my son Mikhail commented, “Papa, you have anger issues…”. I guess this is because I am still at the stage of listening and not (really) obeying. I am not very good at following orders and instructions, you see.

But what I have found in this school of kind-hearted, open-minded and forgiving association of fine (and not so fine) individuals is a new look at God, Love and Life. The perception which was borrowed to me, or perhaps I stole from the Masters’ eyes is to see a world of infinite possibilities, to see the good that is in all of us, to see the beauty in the peace and discord of mankind, to lie awake at night and wonder just how cool God and His Prophet are, to have a tenacious and stubborn belief in the inherent goodness of people whatever bad news the mass media may be peddling at any given point in time, to find Love in the smallest gestures and in the biggest spectacle of human drama, to always feel loved, to always know that I am listened to, to feel empathy for those who do not feel the way I do, and to try and be patient (I am still working at that, sunshine), and finally, to be the best me that I can be, whatever or whoever that may be.

So I am not interested in being holy anymore, sunshine. I leave that to the Masters and good students of the Order. Here, where I am now, I am just trying to be a good sinner…

27. The Good Sinner
I am learning to carry
The good manners of a sinner,
A hypocrite and a charlatan.

Whither I go,
What shall become of me thereafter,
I do not know.

Have a productive Monday, pet.

Pax Taufiqa.

The Sinners' Dictionary - Man is ...

176. Testicles

Man,

A creature torn

Between the mystical

And the testicles.

Dear sunshine. I am still sniffling and coughing from my flu. I wanted to write about Jakarta but I am unable to string coherent sentences. So as of today I am introducing a new section of my writing which I shall call "The Sinners' Dictionary". The prose above is the first of the kind and I do believe it is self-explanatory.

*Sniff* Have a good day, pet. I need to rest my head on something soft and comfy like the tail-end of a comet or something.

Pax Taufiqa

SINCERITY IS EASY

.

Sincerity is Easy

It is easy

to be sincere

if you are good at

lying to yourself.

.

Oops.

.

Did I say that out loud?

.

..............

I hope you are having a great Friday, sunshine.

.

Pax Taufiqa.

Sometimes I am Just TOO Good.

Sometimes we are good and sometimes we are bad. At other times we can be really bad, and perhaps even too good. Hehehe. Just kidding... We can always be better. You go, sunshine! I am afraid I am still batting with egos, angels and djinns in the little sinners league. Just keep a seat for me, wherever your spiritual station may be, will you?

.

Have a great Friday, sunshine. Today I am leaving the city and heading into the woods.

.

Pax Taufiqa.

.

Footnote: Toon is from unpublished archive circa 2004.

An Angelic Message via Mr. Funny Guy

I was in your neighbourhood, sunshine, and I thought it would be a good time to drop in. So I followed the smell of your mother’s cooking and the gospel that was playing in your soul. But arriving at your heart’s door, I was surprised to find an angel peeking through a hole along your white picket fence! The angel was a creature of light and cloaked in feathers of light. He was too engrossed with whatever he was looking at that he did not notice me at all.

I crept close beside him. Well, I guess the correct term is ‘it’, since angels are without gender, but frankly I just do not have the moral fibre to refer to an Angel of God as ‘it’. But I am enough of a fusspot to ask the winged herald, “What the heck are you doing?”

The angel was totally unaffected by my sudden appearence, turning calmly to me and smiling. I find this apparent inability of angels to be surprised infuriating sometimes. But that is besides the point, anyway, this was his reply, “Hi, Taufiq! I was just wondering how to plug this hole.”

Indeed? You were not sneaking a peak?

The angel drew back and stood up to his full height, casting a shadow of light upon me. “Angels do not peek.” He replied coldly. “We merely observe”.

"Hey! I am not judging you." I chuckled. “It is all the same to me - To-may-to To-mah-to, you know. Hehehe.”

The angel gazed at me for a moment before replying, “Ah… We were warned about you, Son of Adam. You are the one that likes to make Ha-Ha. Mr. Funny Guy they call you amongst the lesser brethren”.

“What a pack of lies!” I rejoined hotly.

“You say that, but you are clearly lying."” The angel continued. “I discern that this is yet another one of your attempts at humour.”

Okaay, this angel is a critic. I decided to move on and said. “Oh, nevermind. I am going in now. Are you coming? Or are you too busy ‘fixing’ the peak-hole…”

“I must fly, mortal, for I have urgent errands. As for the hole, I shall ask one of the cherubims to plug it. But this you can tell your friend – That when he sings praises of God, please stop singing the hymns with such sincerity. Or at least not too loud. For he is distracting us from our assignments. Peace!” With that, he was away, flying at a great velocity until he was a speeding little dot in the farthest horizon of your conscience.

Well. Ahem. Here I am then, sunshine… And that was the angel’s message. So keep the volume down, will you?

Hehehe.

Have a good Friday, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa.

The Servant and the Master, Rumi and Abdul Qadir Geylani

PARK HERE. Many eminent people park their cars in the multi-level car-park of my soul, but two names often appear on the bumper stickers - Mevlana Jalaludin Rumi and Shaykh Abdul Qadir Geylani (note that spellings of their names differ according to the book / website that you are reading). They are revered as saints and masters of the Path (Tariqa).

ASK FOR A MASTER. I never did, but a friend of mine, Ranaz once said, “O’ Taufiq. I made a good bargain with God. God always asks us to pray to Him for help. Well last night, I asked Him to find me a true Master. A Man of God who will help and guide me through this world. If God does grant my wish, well and good, but if He doesn’t, He cannot very well then blame me if I fail to stick to the straight and narrow, right? I have got all the bases covered!”.

JALALUDIN RUMI. The great master was once reputed to admonish a seeker who was traveling to see Shaykh Abdul Qadir Geylani. “No, No, don’t go to that shaykh. Stay with me! Stay with me!”

SHAYKH ABDUL QADIR. This sublime master once said, “Whoever doesn’t have a master, I will be his / hers!” He is yours, you know. The default Shaykh. Hehehe.

.

Initially, I rather thought Shaykh Abdul Qadir to be an exponent of tough love. Being the coward that I am, I therefore ran to Rumi, only to find him a little err… dramatic for my taste. Hehehe. So now I bounce like a beachball between one and the other. I am no scholar though. I have never finished reading any compilation of Rumi’s work. Others however appear unable to get enough of this fellow’s prose. In 2002, Time Magazine named him the best-selling poet in the western hemisphere. Wow. Dead for centuries and still shooting arrows of love into the hearts of man.

OKAY, SERIOUSLY SERIOUS. The sinner here wishes to apologise. Firstly, for making jokes that isn’t funny, and secondly, for the flippant writing about topics, that let’s face it, are seriously serious, like religion, soul, life, hope, hubris, hate, mankind, prophets, saints, love and God. I write with levity and humour (well, my idea of humour) because my day job is a lawyer and draughtsman. I have legally serious terms coming out of my Wazoo. Nuances, definitions and interpretations of words are my bread and butter. My battlefield lies in statutory meanings, and customary usage of words. By my pen I try to bring a little certainty into the tumultuous world of commerce and contracts. It can get tiring. It is my daily relief therefore, to be able to write what I write here. 6 years ago, worn and world-weary, this sinner wrote…

167. World Weary
World weary,
The mind becomes numb,
And because it considers itself superior,
It feigns deafness to the good advice,
And exhortations of the heart.

The heart, unbowed, unbroken,
Takes its sustenance from a fountain
In the heart of a Shaykh,
Who draws sustenance
From the heart of Muhammad,
Who in turn, drinks from
The Fountain of Divine Presence,
Beyond which there is no further
Drawing or taking that we are aware of.

And Allah knows best.

YOU HIT THE JACKPOT. If you do come across a bona fide master, good for you! He will speak your name and you will think that no one has ever spoken your name in such a beautiful voice. Never have you heard your name sound so appealing… so beautiful. If people do not understand this relationship that you shall have with him, do not worry. It is your path, and only the master would understand what actually transpired…

8. The Observer
The man observed
The long line of devotees
Waiting outside the Master’s cottage.
Each entered. And in time
Each one left the cottage.
The observer approached everyone and queried;
“Are you happier now that you have met him?”

All in their turn answered, “Nay, we were mistaken.
He is not the one. He cannot help us.”

After awhile, the man left,
Convinced that the Master was a fraud,
Though he knew not, in truth,
What really transpired
Beneath the thatched roof.

BAH! HUMBUG! What people do not understand, they become suspicious of. And perhaps a little envious. This is a common perception faced by all apprentice of love in all religion. Your critics shall say that you are stupid to place someone between you and God. They shall say that man is supposed to be a servant to God and no one else. They will say that this is innovation. They shall say all this because they forget an old wise saying… “If you cannot bow to another man, how can you bow to God? If you are not a servant to mankind, how will you ever be a servant of God?” Dear friends, the best of Masters is the best of Servants and the best of Servants is the best of Masters. That is the rule, but some people will not be able to circumnavigate their mind through this Sea of Love... Not everyone are born to be sailors, you see...

13. I am a servant II
I am a servant,
But it is my Master
That supports me,
Attending to my every need,
Knowing what is best for me,
The Guarantor of my success,
My Love, My Layla.

O’ gainsayers!
Begrudge not my happiness.

For what you call the chain of servitude,
I call home.

And what you say is your mind,
I call it a prison of self-deception.

THEM ARE FIGHTING WORDS! Hehehe. Well, do not take what I write here too seriously, pumpkin. I am after all a sinner (and, OH God… a lawyer too!). But you, who are bright and fresh like a boiled egg, you would see better and travel further along the spiritual path to God. My only hope is that wherever you find yourself, perhaps atop some peak of guided enlightment, you will not forget this old sinner. You will write me a postcard, yes? .

Have a good day, sunshine. Meow.

Pax Taufiqa.

Jelaluddin Rumi, Mikhail, God, Sincerity, Roti Canai and the Rain

2. On the Scale of al-Amin II
O’ seeker, be sincere,
Do not use our secrets
To make you negligent of your worldly duties,
Nor to put obstacles in your worldly affairs.

As Mevlana Rumi once said,
"Worldliness is only forgetting God,
It is not having a family or goods."

And seeker,
There is nothing more worldly than insincerity!
………………..
From the 6th chapter entitled ‘The Scale’, circa 2004

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Saturday morning is a good wet morning. And I took the opportunity to take Mikhail out for breakfast. Here he is, still in his pajamas. He had roti canai (which is something similar to roti prata). But it was cooked by a Malay and not an Indian Muslim so it is different. It is not so crispy and it is very yellow. I don’t know why it is so yellow. It looks like someone accidentally tipped a cup of turmeric into the batter.

The path is not about abandonment of the world. It is not about sacrificing your ambition and dreams. There are many amongst us who could claim that they have abandoned worldliness. But many of us never had much to begin with and perhaps have not tasted the vast beauty and wealth that Dunia (the world) has to offer. Not so much of a sacrifice is it?

It is not smart for seekers to pack their bags, burn their academic certificates and suddenly turn into a wandering hermit. The fact is there are two types of people in the world - the rich and the poor, the prosperous and the needy. Do you really want to be the poor and needy? Forever in need of assistance? Can you bear the great tribulation of envy? Can you carry the mountain of hope? Would you be able to drink the Sea of Self-Doubt as you look at your children and wonder if your earnings will keep them in clothes and food? While a friend is able to take his wife and children on a holiday, what will you say to your youngest child when she says that she wants to go to Disney World too? Or even to the local funfair?

So do not burn your dreams and ambitions on the funeral pyre of your hubris. God doesn't want that. I keep hearing in my ears, an angel (mosquito-sized) cautioning me again and again - We do not want you to change. To be some sorta super-dervish. Our expectations are much more attainable. We want you to be the best that you can be. To walk the world and seek its riches and bounties. To marry and raise a family. To be happy with God and with that person that you call ‘me’.

Mika says he is not like “Tarzan, Lord of the Apes”. He doesn’t want to go about shirtless, he is shy that way. Instead, he rather be “Mikhail, Lord of the Moneys”. He likes having money, he likes spending money and he (will) like earning it. He is material-inclined. But he doesn’t worry me at all. Because above all things, I teach him that God and Prophet (the Boss) is the Best of All.

So this rainy Saturday morning, I took Mikhail out for breakfast. And as the rain fell from heaven, we ate, happy in each other’s company. And I did not forget God this time. How can I, when He has given me the happiest joy of my life? My little boy.

So I leave you today with thoughts of Jelaluddin Rumi, Mikhail, God, sincerity, roti canai and the rain.

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Have a beautiful Saturday, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa.