The Hamsters of God - in the wheel of a Constant Presence...

A Hamster of God

I wake up early

To wait for the rising dawn

And the crisp fresh air

And greet my Lord,

For I know, verily,

He waits for me!

In the beginning of every day,

I am so happy I could just

Lie down and die,

For me this is no heaven,

But some inscrutable

Constant Presence.

If only you could feel what I feel,

You would not think me proud,

You would be happy, just like me

A hamster running with God,

Wheels within wheels within wheels!

Wheeeee!

…………………………

I was happy, having an early cup of coffee below my office and suddenly wondering, "Where is the sky?" I raised my head and there it was… between the back of the cooking school, above the equestrian shop and a back alley sign of the failed little pub. Somehow, this assures me more and I smile to one one in particular...

Where is the sky... where is the sky??

In the history of Islam we have had the Lion of God, the Sword of God and all other blessed and innumerable titles, marking the steadfast and true faith of many men and women of Islam. As I doubt that I have the bearing to carry any great or courageous adjectives, I have chosen something perhaps more amenable... the humble, rodent-family but nonetheless cute little hamster. I am not claiming this exclusively for myself, you know, you too can be part of this elite group of wheel turning, food chomping, energetic band of Animalia Chordata Vertebrata Mammalia Rodentia Myomorpha Muroidea Cricetidae Cricetinae (to give our full scientific name).

So today, as you trudge into your office, perhaps feeling like a tired little rodent in a wheel and cog of a large cold machine, do not despair for you are not alone. We are with you. And if you ever feel threatened by such despondency, look out of the nearest window and remember that however small you may feel you are, you are still under the same glorious blue and white sky of God, the One Creator who loves His highest and lowest servants with infinite Love and limitless compassion. I am saying this, from one hamster to another...

Ahh... there is the sky... alhamdulillah

Have a good working week, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Mikhail and His Verbal Jackhammer

Aieeeeeeeee! Someone make him stop!

Have you ever spent one hour with your son (or daughter) and you felt like your beloved child was drilling into your head with a verbal jackhammer? - Papa, why are you back early? Papa, I think I hate school. Papa, you win Angrybird every time when I am with you! Papa, I love the Beast Quest books! Papa, when are you sending me back to small house? Papa, your tummy is so big! Papa, can we sleep early tonight... and on and on and on. You get it. It's a Papa-Papa-Papa-Papa-Papa parade... And it drives me nuts sometime.

Mika's jackhammer is blue. Because he's a  boy obviously.

I came back pretty tired today, and I saw that Mikhail's ustaz (religious teacher) is in the living room teaching him to read Arabic scripts. I waved at Mika and ducked upstairs to my room. Not 10 minutes after, Mika comes crashing into my room wearing only his yellow Sponge Bob underwear.I sought a clarification from my son as to his state of undress. He replied smiling and chuckling to himself, "(After the ustaz left) I wanted to see you so much that I couldn't wait to get dressed!""

Hmm. Maybe I can deal with a few more hours under Mikhail's jackhammer...

Life is so lovely sometimes, and some moments so poignant that I am glad I have a path to channel all these observations. So thank you sunshine, for being here and listening.

God bless.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

God's Divine Devices & Denominations - love's proxy on Earth

Even in the darkest labyrinth, Love can light your path.

Divine Device and Denomination

O' Love, be with me always

And leave me not alone with myself

And my capricious ego.

And if I cannot see You, O' Love...

Then let me rest in the goodwill of my friends,

Let me sit beneath the shade of my family tree,

Let me seek solace in the company of good deeds

And good thoughts of my kin past, present and future,

Let me take comfort in the kindness of a stranger,

Let me be happy in the smile of a kindly acquaintance,

Let me be guided by the wise and inspired master,

Let me be guarded in the wisdom of those with patience,

Let me take shelter in you, o’ God, o’ Prophet,

In whatever divine device and denomination

You have chosen to express

Your Love, Mercy and

Compassion.

..................

This is how I normally fall from the
peak into the valley.

I do not know about you, but I myself have never ever seen God. Oh, I have heard a lot about Him, and like most controversial personalities, there are those who adore Him (most believers) and there are those who abhor Him (such as they are). Neither of both groups have actually seen God, yet they hold very strong and passionate views about Him.

I would like to confess that I adore God 24/7, but my feelings towards Him are sometimes ambivalent, and has its peaks and valleys. Sometimes the peaks appear to reach so high that I can imagine hearing Angels and Saints singing His praise. At other times my valleys are so far down that I can almost smell the crackling black flames of Hades. It does not smell good.

So I am stuck with this world and the proxies of Divine devices and denomination - they can be people and events, things which strike my heart as bearing some beautiful favour and grace from God. Mostly they are my family and friends, but goodness can (and has) come from strangers and unexpected sources. Help and assistance can come from a Muslim, a Christian, a Buddhist or a Jew. Even an Atheist and Agnostic, funnily enough. God has so much to give you that He will use all necessary means to get to you. So if a stranger knocks on the door of your heart, do not be afraid. Give the greetings of peace and invite the stranger in.

Give the greetings of peace and invite the stranger in.

Have a lovely Monday, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

Flames are created only to be extinguished - Our Personal Hell

93. Calling on rain, mercy and the Ocean of the Lord

I am calling on rain,
I am asking for mercy,
To put out the fires
In my garden of flames,

They talk of Hell
As a place far off,
Do they not see
That it is here and now?

Why are they not
Calling for rainstorms?
Why do they remain silent
When there is an ocean
Waiting to wash away the
Fiery blooms and weeds
Of Hell’s garden?

They talk of God
As a far-off Lord,
Do they not see
That He is here already?

In their blindness
They despair,
And in their despair
They overcompensate,
Mixing regret with
Sorrow, envy and hate.

They talk of Religion
As a far-off idol,
Cold and indifferent,
Unseeing the glittering pearl,
Refusing their inheritance.

We? We are not worried,
For if we misstep into
A field of fire, we just
Scream, "Ouch!" And
Step out.

It is the conviction of some mystics that Hell, if you wish to give it a name, is something that is not delayed. Unlike in the past, when karmic retribution is withheld until after you pass away, there is some indication that the spiritual and physical penalties are all arriving at our threshold on a daily basis, delivered by that not-to-be-denied postman known as Fate.

This is not bad news, actually. It is good news. For God knows how we can deal with Hell after we have died. But if Hell is already making its appearances now, then there is always something we can do to reverse our bad inclinations and encourage our better selves. It is simple, really. Difficult yes, but simple...

So if you yourself are living through your own personal Hell, take solace that you are not alone. We are all in it. So let us help each other by calling on the Rain of Mercy and the Ocean of God. Don't you know that flames are created only to be extinguished?

Think about it, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam

Love will show the Way

The Lord of Discord and the Meaning of War - Sinners' Dictionary

14. Lord of Discord
We resist the lord of discord,
Who rules over those
Who let their anger hold sway.

In their mad utterance,
He shapes their clay.
And in their violence
Is his to play.

To no fleeting shadow,
Will we bow,

To no whispers spun in the dark,
Do we bend.

For we serve the Lord of Accord,
And under His flag
We fear no discord.

I woke up this morning early, before the first ray of the sun spreads its glorious light upon this earth. And I expected something in the breeze to tell me a story. Something to say for this overcast Sunday. But nothing came to me. No verse, no prose no story. So I returned to my old poetry collection and found this old prose written perhaps two years ago.

The Lord of Discord has no name, unless it is our name. He has no form unless it is our form. He can do nothing to this world, and even the smallest ant is safe from him. Alas, through history we become his abject slave... setting swords, arrows and bullets upon our brothers and sisters. And all over words. Because in the Sinners' Dictionary war is defined thus...

War is...
A Series of Battles
Over the Meaning
Of Words.

When we stop talking and perhaps more importantly, when we stop listening, we become a ghost of our true selves. Another pawn in the momentum of a false history. Because the truth is, Love has always been king. From the looking glass of Glorious Love, there was never a Crusade, the Cold War never happened, and this thing which the media and leaders like to refer to as the jihad, the great clash between civilisations and faiths is a great big lie. Civilisations and Faiths must essentially be the same one thing - if we obey the Lord of Accord, whose counsel to be patient and understanding rises again and again in our Conscience...

The world has two histories you can choose from to inspire your life. The history of hate and the history of love. The power, and the responsibility to choose wisely is yours.

We must listen, sunshine. So we can be the true repository of Truth and Love in a world blinded by the illusory power of hate. Hate, like evil - exists in the absence of Love. And I know you are not like that at all...

Hehehe. Well it appears the breeze has spoken. The Sun is shining now and the wind has blown the overcast clouds away... I have my story.

I love you, sunshine. Have a perfect Sunday contemplating this joyous world...

Pax Taufiqa.

Sinner's Sunday Reflection Part II - An Event Occured

Religion, like Love, do not change me. It reveals who I really am. Sometimes I wish I never stumbled into Love’s trap. With all its bait of honey, joy, happiness, paradise, contentment and beauty, Love is ultimately an event. Perhaps THE EVENT of them all. And like events, it has its moments, only to drift away a second later.

But Love is also the brightest and truest mirror of them all – and when Love catches your reflection in its bright shiny surface – what does it reveal? Ah, my friends – you have come to know me, the sinner, for all I am worth. In order words, worthless really. For the longer I spend my time fussing with my make-up and posing like a peacock before Love’s Mirror, the uglier I appear to become. All my unsightly hairs, warts and blackspots appearing on my soul’s skin like truth out of the swamp of my contemplation.

Then I turn away quickly, protesting, “This is not me! This is not me!” But if this is not me, then who is this ugly duckling looking back at me across the mirror? And if this is not me, then where am I?

What a turn of event, isn’t it, pet? Just an hour or two ago I was posting up a typically happy-sinner poem, and now here I am – tired and worn, battered and torn.

Happiness? It is also an event, and comes and goes without our fully comprehending it. Okay, I was not ecstatic, but at least I was contented awhile back. Then out of the blazing blue, a sms arrived into my cellphone, full of dissatisfaction. I opened the sms, read it and switched off my cellphone.

No doubt even this Sad Event would pass away, I know. Really, of that I am certain. But while this sorrow lingers, who else can I turn to? Who else can accept this sinner, with his appalling habits and laziness? Yes, sunshine, I have to turn to God and His Prophet. I turn to Love as the Only True Essence, seek its embrace and cower my face into its welcoming bosom. “The world is painful today…”, I would mutter, “Oh, I am so happy I have you to turn to….” I say this with no arrogance, because when all of creation is hurtful, only the Creator suffices to cool my injured pride.

After all, from Love, I have nothing whatsoever to hide.

I continued to sigh alone in front of my emo-breakfast. Then suddenly, whispered into me by a long dead soul were these words –

The world is used in two ways,
As a carrot to bait you to the Lord,
And as a stick to chase you to the Lord.

Either way should that not make you happy?

And look closely at the world again,
And at the hand holding the carrot and stick,
Does it not look strangely familiar?
Does it not look strikingly like yours?

Reflect, sinner!

*Sigh* Well, what can I say... the dead dude is right after all. So I am switching on my cellphone again. You can call if you wanna, sunshine.

Pax Taufiqa.

Instrument of the Devil, Impatience, Saintly Clerks and Me

AT THE DENTIST. I am not a patient man, but there is however one situation where I am not just patient, literally I am PATIENCE itself. As a paragon of consideration and compromise, I turn into a statue of perseverance at my dentist. Every atom of my being suddenly patient, transforming me into an inert life form – a barely sentient glob of flesh and blood in the dental dungeon. I am NEVER IN A HURRY when I am at the dental clinic. In fact I am never in a hurry to get to a dental clinic. You know… all those contretemps and happenstances that causes you to delay or postpone your dental appointment. Suddenly, you have to paint your room, suddenly, you have to reorganize your shoe rack. You know, riiiight? And in such cases, I never bitch or complain about having to postpone seeing my dentist – “Not available this week? Gee whiz! Never mind, maybe in 3 month’s time? No? Dr. Rachel can see me sooner? But WHY? Really I don’t mind at all, I know she has a busy practice… Perhaps sometime next year? Hello? Hello?”

.

RED MIST. Despite my numerous postings about patience, I am probably the most impatient man in Malaysia. I can become an ogre when the red mist of rage washes over my eyes - Especially when I am alone and there is no company to calm me down.

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INSTRUMENT OF THE DEVIL. I remember when I first started practicing as a lawyer in 2000. In those days, me and my partner did mostly conveyancing work (real estate sale and transfer), which inevitably requires dealings with the Land Office. And in those days we were still typing on Land Office forms, as not many departments have digitized their documents. I remember coming to the office one Saturday, with 24 (yes, Twenty Four!) blank Memorandum of Transfer Form to be typed out for a conveyancing file. Of course, I just need one form to be typed, but knowing my very limited typing skill, I thought 2 dozen is a good back-up in case I mess-up typing a form. For you see, in those days you are not permitted to use correction ink. And no rubbing with the eraser too. Surely, I was being over-cautious, I thought.

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Well, as it turned out, I managed (barely) to type the 24th form correctly, after 2 hours of bedlam and 23 copies of typing failures. If you walked into the office at that time, you would see a sea of torn crumpled papers strewn around the feet of a mad lawyer, his hair disheveled, his eyes probably cross-eyed and crazy-looking. To be honest, if it weren’t for the busy road under my office (which was on the 3rd floor), I would have thrown the typewriter out of the window.

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I don't go crazy with typewriters anymore. Now I leave it to the infinite patience of my clerks. The girls are amazing, and I am ever in awe of their patience - So young, yet so wise. What I write about, they live...

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7. Patience, that Beautiful Steed!
Patience! O’ Lord,
Of such things that will help me,
Help me attain this!
Patience in happiness and sorrow,
Patience in wealth and poverty,

Patience,
Graceful and most loved,
That beautiful steed ridden
By Your Prophet and Friends!

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Have a nice day, sunshine! May you find patience however you may be tested.

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Pax Taufiqa.