Friday, May 31, 2013

MY LEAVING WILL COST ME NOTHING - al-Najm ath-Thaqib (s.a.w.s.)

A Funeral Wreath
Let this day be the last day of my life,
It this is best for me,
Let this night be the last night of my life,
It this is best for me,
Let this breath be the last breath for me,
If this is best for me,
Let these words be the last words that I write,
It this is best for me,
Let these thoughts of You be the last that passes through my mind,
Let this thirst for You be the last thirst that I feel,
Let this hunger for You be the last pain that I feel,

It this is best for me, quench my thirst and sate my hunger...
Let my eyelids close for the last time knowing You are waiting for me,
Let my family not cry nor mourn my passing,
For my leaving will costs me nothing...

With You are the end of all my restless dreaming,
Tiresome scheming and fruitless thinking.

For You are my beginning
And my ending.

Good Friday. If you can pick a day to pass away, it is said that Friday is a good day to do so. Indeed, Friday is a good day to do anything really, whether it is to move house, to change work, to marry, to begin a journey, to rest, to contemplate and reflect, to visit friends and relatives, to visit the graves of our dearly departed. 

It is also a good day to ask things from God. It is of course not necessary that you wait until today, but as today is already here, why let this Friday go to waste? Hmm, what can I ask God? Ah yes, something like this has been sheltering under the shade of my soul last night, a presumptuous little prayer...

The Servant that Didn't Happen
Oh Lord, 
You, Who has made me fall in love with You,
Therefore, You must care for me
And let me stray not one moment from You!
You, Who can make anything happen,
Make me to be the servant that didn't happen!
A moment that didn't occur,
A second that didn't pass,
The insignificant nothing
To Your Compelling

He he he. So many exclamation marks! I guess this is not to everyone's taste. And even to my lips, this cup of prayer tastes strange and foreign. But this is Friday the Blessed, so I think we are granted a little dispensation, yes? And anyway, even in this strangeness there is familiarity. Like the familiarity of al-Najm ath-Thaqib s.a.w.s. (Piercing Star) whose brightness lights up the darkest of our skies. Al-Najm ath-Thaqib is one of the inspired names of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.). May God Almighty preserve us in the Path of His Light (s.a.w.s.). 

And though we cannot pick the day that we die, Oh Lord... please pick us! Please pick us!

Have a lovely Friday, sunshine. Dare and do!

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Thursday, May 30, 2013

KEEP CALM. ACT DUMB. - legacy of PRU 13

Malaysia just had one of the most transparent and divisive general election since its independence. And the embers of discontentment with the election results are still glowing reddish. The incumbent government that prevailed in the general election claims one thing, and the opposition continues to claim another. The truth, as it often is, lies somewhere between the great divide. 

In times like this I like to act dumb. And funnily enough I find acting dumb a very easy thing to do. I am almost naturally gifted to be dumb. 

But never you mind, sunshine. Don't listen to those naughty politicians with their slippery tongue and those NGOs with their earnestness. And when people ask you if you are a fence-sitter, tell them no. Tell them that you are following the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) and that you want to pull down the fences that divide all of us - The fence erected by our egos and propped by our nafs. Ergo, we shall begin with dismantling the first fence, our own egos. 

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

THE ANGEL OF ADAB - life's little ironies and God Almighty

The Angel of Adab
(or The Exhilaration of Ascent and Descent)
One evening, I met the Angel of Adab,
And he gathered me in his arms,
Spread his wings far to the East
And further to the West,
Before carrying me up,
High above the mountains,
High above the clouds,
High above the meaning
Of mountains and clouds,
To places whose names
Are not recorded in 
Any earthly 

"Look here, Mr. Angel" I said,
"It is all very well for you to
Bear me up so high,
But why?"

The Angel said,
"To experience the exhilaration 
Of the ascent, of course!"

"And what if I was to fall
From the sky?"

To which the Angel replied,
"Then you shall experience the exhilaration
Of the descent, of course!"
(adab means manners, or good manner)

Angels. What a humourless lot they are. We were keeping company with books in the Hermitage in the Sky, when above us, clouds and sunlight formed to create a beautiful tapestry. He watched my face brighten with gladness looking at the stunning vista, before he interrupted my thoughts thus, "Aah... no doubt that so high above the earth you would feel so close to God and to goodly thoughts, do you not?"

I nodded my agreement.

Then he continued. "Yet to take that final step towards the Divine Presence, you need to be met by the Brethren Angel of Death and your inert body lowered into a freshly dug grave, into the Earth itself. Is this not true?"

"Yes, true and very ironic." I noted.

 "You will find many ironies on this journey." He concluded, before once again, we fell silent in awe of Allah's manifest beauty and recreation.

Humourless, angels might be, but by God they are truthful.
He he he.

wa min Allah at-taufiq, madad ya Saydeena Muhammad (s.a.w.s.), madad ya Shah e Mardan, Saydeena Ali Ibn Abu Talib (r.a.)

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Monday, May 27, 2013

THE SHIRK OF SELF - sharing or associating blame to something or someone other than me

Yesterday's sunset

The Shirk of Self & Blameworthiness
Between yesterday's sunset
And today's sunrise,
I have learnt of
The Shirk of Self and 
The Shirk of Blameworthiness;
When for the longest time I have associated
My self to something or someone other than me
By associating my sins and mistakes to something or someone other than me.
So lest I forget, let me declare that I bear witness that
There is none more blameworthy than me
In all that I do or fail to do!

What is shirk? At its basic as taught to me all those many years ago, shirk is the act of associating or making a partner to God Almighty, or in another way, by associating or partnering God to other things or deities. 

The Shirk of Self and Blameworthiness is a form of shirk where the sinner associates his sins, his neglect and errors to something or someone other than himself. It is running away from the oneness of his blameworthiness, and the veiling of his sins from himself. This is spiritual poison as.. 

...we must accept the blame, and let blame call us by our own name...

Because the alternative is impossible. The alternative path is the path of rejecting one of the beautiful divine attributes of Allah (s.w.t.) when He Himself said in a hadith (oral tradition) of our majestic Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.), 

"O' My servants, I have forbidden oppression for Myself and have made it forbidden amongst you, so do not oppress one another."

Oppression has a very wide meaning and would include being unfair, and placing blame unfairly. Were we to blame something else or (even worse) someone else for our own folly and misdeeds, we have not only oppressed that something else or someone else, but we would have also denied God's absolute utter Fairness and Rightness by claiming, "How can I be blamed? It was him, it was her! It was the weather, it was the hunger, it was the Sun, it was the Moon, it was time! It was the lack of time! It was too much time! It was my work, it was my parents who failed to bring me up well! It was the day, it was the night! It was everything and everyone else... I cannot be blamed. I am not to be blamed! There speaks the ego of Mankind through the ages.

Acceptance of blame is the acceptance of the power of Allah the Changer of People, Things and Circumstances. Ya Allah... I am to be blamed! I am the blameworthy one! You are the One that cannot be blamed for any wrong! So in Your Rightness, right me! In your Absolute Utter Correctness, correct me! Guide me and leave me not a moment alone to the whispers of my ego and the Accursed one! O' Thou Who art the Only Owner of Absolute Fairness, Place me amongst the Nation of Muhammad, upon whom shines a Lamp Fair and Wonderous beyond the contemplation of mortal men!


Hi there, sunshine. What are you doing here today, reading the ramblings of this sinner? There must be some purpose... come to my life and help me, for I am ever in need of those that Allah (s.w.t.) and the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) has sent to guide me to goodness, away from the ego-centric deception of my shirk of myself. 

Today's sunrise.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Saturday, May 25, 2013

THE LEARNING WITHOUT ENDING - a simple reflection for a simpleton

May Allah Honour Him and Grant Him Peace. They asked the old man, "Why do you say 'sallallahu alayhi wasalam' after you write or say 'Muhammad'? To which his answer was, "I used to wonder the same. But no more. For now I am glad to say 'Muhammad' because it gives me the opportunity to follow thereafter with 'sallalahu alayhi wasalam'. 

"And what made you wonder no more?", they pressed him further. 

He replied, "Since I have come to understand that the love Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) has for us is manifested in every likeness, every fondness, every happy familiarity, every touching moment, every love, every intimacy, every pleasure, every relief, every discovery, every contentment, every cure, every success, every knowledge, every wisdom, every beautiful feeling, every enlightened thought, every epiphany, every inspiration, every beauty, every acts of mercy and kindness, every generosity, every thoughtfulness, every spark of empathy, every inventiveness, every solution, every answer, every acts of courage, virtue and chivalry, every embrace, every greeting, every friendly moment, every association, every reunion, every healing of discord and enmity that we have ever experienced... and that every joy that has ever passed through this world comes through Muhammad's (s.a.w.s.), because he intercedes on behalf of all of us before Allah (s.w.t.) Himself. For God Almighty has made Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) of the most exalted nature."

"And how come you to understand this?"

The man smiled and said, "How can I not? Each day, and each moment within each day, this world declares and bears witness to this. I was taught to silence the noise of my ego, and to learn instead to watch, observe, listen and obey. And so I have gained some belief. But do you know what is the best thing of all?"

"No, tell us." They asked.

"I am still leaning."


Good morning, sunshine. Don't worry wherever you may be and however low you think your learning is. That you are searching is already very good indeed. Leave your guidance to the One Who Guides. There is no end in this journey, and there is no end in what your Lord can teach you. And foremost is perhaps this, that the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) is no optional extra to the faith of Islam...

for Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) is the Messenger, and the Embodiment of the Message. 

Have a wonderful Sabbath.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

I AM LOOKING FOR 'I' - a sinner in a hermitage in the sky

I looking for 'I'
I am looking for 'I',
Leaving my home to look for home,

I am looking for 'I',
Leaving myself to find myself,

I am looking for 'I',
So God shan't sigh,
"My dear old chum, 
You never even tried."

I am looking for 'I'
And leaving my 'I'ness behind,

So look for me, my friend,
At the Hermitage in the Sky.

Hermitage in the Sky. Over the past couple of weeks, the sinner (that is me, a regular old sinner, nothing extraordinary) was considering taking an apartment in the area of Damansara Damai which is, I reckon about 1 hour plus drive (during rush hour) or a mere 15 minutes away (at any other time) from my lifelong neighbourhood of Bukit Damansara. So after much thought, I have decided to take the place for one month trial period. Most landlords would balk at such a proposal, but I have no landlord, for it is a she, and the landlady is my good friend, Rina.

Early this morning I went over to sweep and mop the first floor before going to the office. Let me tell you that mopping is no joke. Mop, rinse, mop, rinse, mop, rinse. And it was initially annoying because the floor was dusty and wet, so wherever I mopped I would leave a trail of mucky foot prints all over the place. So I would wipe the foot prints, again and again and again until there was no more trail of dirt on the marbled floor.

Adab of the Mop. And this mop story is important to me because it is a reflection of life. Often we look at other people and see dirt and stains on their character, and we are resolved to rehabilitate these poor sinners, without noticing the trail of debris and muck we ourselves leave behind in 'helping' them. Because we are not helping actually, but in truth, judging. When you are alone with a mop your mind wanders. He he he.

I brought Mak Ndak, my late mum's elder sister to see the place last weekend. She said it was kinda far, but she thinks it is pretty. That is good enough for me. As my mother is not around anymore, it is important that I have her blessings, albeit my stay may only be a while...

About this transition, I am both happy and sad. Which, when you think of the state of the world, ain't really too bad.

See you at the hermitage, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Monday, May 20, 2013

Living With a Pregnant Woman - by Mikhail

"This pregnancy thing is going overboard."

My son was with me over the weekend. During which Mikhail practically never stopped speaking. There was always something for him to share with me. About his school, his friends, his computer games and his life generally. I always enjoy his company, and his interesting observation of the world. He he he.

My son is insightful. Even with chopsticks inside his nose.
His mother is pregnant, which is good news for Gina and her husband, Herman. But having a pregnant woman in the house does affect some necessary changes to one's daily life. So now Mika is expected to do some minor chores. One afternoon his mom asked him to set the table for lunch, and undoubtedly he was busy playing or reading, but being the good boy that he is he got up anyway to do the job. But Gina overheard his dissatisfaction as he mumbled under his breath, "This pregnancy thing is going overboard."

And it continues. "You know, Papa..." he said, "I really don't know if Mummy is lazy because she is lazy or because she is pregnant. Just now, she asked me to fetch the remote for her... but it was just a feet away from her!" And he was also alarmed by his mother's sudden lack of patience. "Mummy gets angry quicker than you Papa... and that is saying something."

Have a beautiful Monday, sunshine. It is raining outside, alhamdulillah... (God be praised). And that too is saying something. May Allah bless our children, the bright sparkle which constantly entertains us and challenges our attitude and beliefs.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way  

Friday, May 17, 2013

TRUE FOR ME, TRUE FOR YOU - the Way of the Prophet and the Way with the Prophet

True For Me, True For You
You think I am looking for death?
Truth is I am looking for Muhammad.
You think I am looking for wealth?
Truth is I am looking for Muhammad.
You think I am looking for knowledge?
Truth is I am looking for Muhammad.
You think I am looking for love?
Truth is I am looking for Muhammad.
You think it is light that you perceive?
Truth is what you see is Muhammad.
You think it is goodness that you receive?
Truth is it is Muhammad that you receive.
No books will tell you this. No spoken words.
It is the reverberations in your heart
By which you know this to be true...
True for me, true for you,
True for all.

Verily, my friend...
Does your heart not recall?

I was driving early this morning, while the sky was still dark and the Sun has not risen yet over the East. And while on the road I was listening to the radio. It was a local forum where people would write in for the ustaz (religious teacher) to answer. So this morning someone asked the question, "Are we permitted to pray for death?" And this was his answer.

"It is prohibited generally because death is in the power and sole authority of God to determine. However there is a way for someone to pray for death. And it is in the Hadis (oral traditions) of the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.). The prescribed prayer is thus - 'O' God, if living is better for me, then give me life. If death is better for me, then give me death.' After all, are we entirely aware of our state at any point in time in our life? We may be doing Qiamullail every night (extended supererogatory prayers to be done in the early hours of the morning) and fasting every other day, but we cannot know for certain of our state. And it is not for Man to (try to) run from the destiny that God has determined for him."

The Way of Muhammad. We do not know what God has in store for us today. Who does? Nor are we merely asking or even waiting for death in some sleepy dervish daze. Our Masters are teaching us to forever ask for Muhammad (s.a.w.s.), and not to ask for life or death, save for a life with Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) and death with Muhammad (s.a.w.s.). And what of work, play, love, marriage, ambition, food, companionship, dreams, fun, recreation, money, health, wealth, you might ask? What of these things which we (or our ego) desire? Such things, I am told, are best with Muhammad(s.a.w.s.)

The Way with Muhammad. You know, sunshine, you can choose to live life in ignorance of Muhammad (s.a.w.s.). But why would you desire that way? Even to fully enjoy a simple apple (or orange), there is no better way than to eat it in the Way of Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) (also known as the Prophet's Sunnah), and in the Way with Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) which can be your own Sunnah.

At the final resting place of almarhum Sultanul Qulb Shaykh Raja Ashman Shah ibn Sultan Raja Azlan
Shah. These simple things I write today I learnt from him, but I cannot recall much of what he said.
For me at least he spoke little, but his adab (good manners) spoke volumes.
And indeed, even to this day his adab still speaks with beautiful clarity.
al fatiha

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

TRUE LOVE UNVEILED - the Courtship, the Yearning and the Light of Muhammad

Writing is my courtship,
And though I seldom tire of it
I cannot deny my restless heart's
Anticipation of this courtship's 
Promised consummation,

Thus while I hold at bay my own ego that besieges me,
Crossing my path like a hydra-headed dragon,
I wait here still, at the Door of Love,
Captivated by the Light shining like a beacon.

Writing is not just writing. Writing comes from contemplation and reflection. And if one is predisposed to contemplate and reflect upon the True Love that is given but rarely understood by Man, a yearning grows. A yearning to see this True Love unveiled. To end this courtship in the consummation of the Divine Presence of Allah (s.w.t.).

Verily, Man would despair in melancholic longing, lost and maddened by the siren calls of the True Love. And it is only the generosity of Allah s(.w.t.) that He has let shine a Light from His Divine Presence into our murky world of the ego. A Light that baths the Man with assurance, hope and a promise of mercy without parallel - The Light of Muhammad (s.a.w.s.), before which all darkness is dispelled.

Have a wonderful day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way 

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

THE DOOR OF SADNESS & THE GATE OF KNOWLEDGE - the priceless inheritance of Muslims (may they remember to ask!)

Gone Before Dawn
What is worth dying for
Is worth living for,
What is worth living for
Is always worth loving,

So love thy mother and thy father,
Love thy brother and thy sister,
Love the wise and the foolish,
The saints, the saintly and the sinners,
Love the music of children laughing,
Love the songs that the birds sing,
Love the peace that you enjoy,
Love the things you loved 
When you were just a little boy,
Love the silence before dusk,
Love the chorus before dawn,
Swear your love to them all,
For one day, who knows?
They may all be gone...

They may all be gone...

Bukit Kiara Cemetery, with Mr.Cemetery himself, Mikhail.

BEREAVEMENT. To those you have known before they are no more, to those you have known and yet have never met in this world, to the beautiful memories you have shared and for the memories yet to be made, what do we have to offer but our oath of fealty, our solemn promises of love?

DOOR OF SADNESS. As frail human beings, with mortal vessels that contain our ancient spirit, we are accorded some room for grief. A chamber to house our sorrow and lament the passing of our beloved kindred. To sigh when we inadvertently glanced at a picture of our mothers, fathers, family and friends who have all passed on. But this Door of Sadness, this gate through which our tears flow is also the gate of our heart, the abode of our Most Compassionate God who says that "Though Creation cannot contain Me, the heart of a true believer can."

At the Royal Mausoleum, Bukit Chandan, Kuala Kangsar.

GATE OF KNOWLEDGE. Thus the Door of Sadness is also the Gate of Knowledge, through which we are connected to our Grandshaykhs, the Masters of the Path (Tariqa). Above the laments of our own mortality, is the chorus of the Saints, the Friends of God, who, to this day attend to the matters of this world under the power of the Master of Creation, Muhammad Habibullah (s.a.w.s.) and His Companions. And amongst whom, Saydina Ali ibn Abu Talib is indeed known as the Gate of Knowledge, the entrance to the City of Knowledge that is the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.).

THE DIVINE COCKTAIL. It is thus the priceless inheritance of the Muslims, blessed and fortunate as they are (may they remember!), that contemplation and remembrance of our dearly departed, inevitably intermingles with Allah (s.w.t.), His Beloved Muhammad (s.a.w.s) and all His Companions(r.a.) and Saints (q.s.). Thus we find...

The Intermingling
In our remembrance of the dearly departed,
Our mortality intermingles with immortality,
Our sorrow intermingles with great joy,
Our uncertainty intermingles with assurance,
Our love intermingles  with the Greatest Love of All,
That is the Love of Allah for His Muhammad...

He shouldn't be whirling so close to the water's edge. But kids... they will have their fun.
By the riverside maqam of Tok Temong, Kuala Kangsar.

So if you are in mourning for someone, even if it is for yourself, have great hope, my friend. For you are assured of love, mercy and compassion of a Lord matchless in His vows of love, mercy and compassion for you and the reasons for your sorrow.


wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Monday, May 13, 2013

THE GOOD AND BEAUTIFUL WORLD - contemplation of our days and humanity

Dawn in Bukit Damansara.

Meet Monday
I am a Day,
Nestled in the cradle of time,
Waiting for the moment that the Sun
Rises in the East of your Conscience,
Bright and Luminous like Angel Wings,
Feathered heralds of a Lord 
Most Compassionate, Most Merciful!

I am a Day,
And I was created to be yours,
To fill me with love, affection and knowledge,
For you to awake and recall the bounty of your Lord
And to take what is fated to be yours,
And to give freely, as your Lord gave freely!

I am a Day,
And I was created for work, remembrance and play
For how joyful is life in this world when your hand
Turns on the plough of honest toil and remembrance
Of the Lord who gave you this Day
That is me!

I am a Day,
And I am Monday,
Tomorrow you shall meet my sister, Tuesday
And the next my brother, Wednesday,
And thus the world turns,
As the Sun rises and sets,
And the Moon shines upon your twilight,
Rich and bountiful is your Lord's blessings upon you,
Your soul flying high in His sky like a kite!

I planned to write something different. Some note on the enjoyment of the Mosque, the gathering and association of friends and strangers to the Pool of Remembrance. But perhaps that is meant for another day.

Masjid Umar al-Khattab, Bukit Damansara

The world is good and beautiful. Today, this Monday morning, my attention was turned to my left, as a luminous sky heralds the new day. And so passes through the ken of Man, sometimes unnoticed, the divine signs of Beauty in this world. For however insignificant this world is compared to the reality of Allah (s.w.t.), however transient its nature, this world cannot be anything but good and beautiful, because the Creator, God Almighty is the Absolute One, absolute in His Goodness and in His Beauty. 

The Fountain of Fitrah. And because this world was created as a stage, as each member of humanity looks to understand his role better, to speak his lines perfectly, to immerse himself in his inner character, that fitrah which is the rightful inheritance of all mankind. Your own fitrah, that natural skill and inclination which flows from the Fountain of Fitrah that is Abu Arwah (Father of Souls), Muhammad, Prophet of God (s.a.w.s.).

So have a good day, sunshine. For the day is good already!

Your soul flying high in His Sky like a kite!

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Saturday, May 11, 2013

OUR EXISTENCE ANCIENT - the beautiful nature of time... and of our cousins and mothers.

Our Existence Ancient
Age is just a means by which we mark
Our time in this world,
For however our body may age,
It shall never exceed the measure of our soul,
Our existence ancient beyond its mortal cage.

DAY OF COUSINS. Today is a day of cousins for me. I met a 51 year old Shan bin Sulaiman for breakfast (he promised me a local delicacy called popiah basah to lure me to his neighbourhood). And awhile back tonight I attended the wedding of my cousin's son, Aiman. Sitting at my table were two of my beautiful cousins, Kak Nani and Kak Lah, who is 61 and 63 years old respectively. I myself am going to be 43 years old this year, so to count the number of years between us four cousins it is 218 years. If we add my father's time, which is just one year short of 80, it would be 297 years - almost 3 centuries. Hehehe. Makes me ponder, this number does. 

I was thus pondering when suddenly the song A Thousand Years wafted through the wedding hall and I was almost overcome with a profound melancholic feeling. And in that brief moment I recall the history of my Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s), my Prophet Jesus (a.s.) and the retinue of Muhammad's Companions known as the Sahabat, and the golden chain of forty Grand Shaykhs and many more Shaykhs and Saints, all of whom I have been introduced to. And thus also in that moment, the face of my late mother came to me, who introduced me to this world. 

So you see, more than a thousand years can pass within a solitary moment, though you are in a crowded wedding reception, with happy smiling people and their happy smiling faces. This thought made me paused  in my contemplation, as I too smiled back at my cousins. Alhamdulillah.

Have a lovely Sabbath, sunshine.

See you soon.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Thursday, May 9, 2013

THE VERSES OF THE KING - my Liege with limitless reach and my Liege Love

Life is a journey in the understanding of His Love. And however far
we may drift, help is always at hand. Don't worry.

My Liege With His Limitless Reach
Does being a sinner mean that I cannot talk of You?
Do I need to be good to yearn for something good?
But if I am already good why would I need You at all?
And if I am already strong to whom would I need to belong?

You made me and you call upon me to talk to You...
So why do they say that I cannot talk of You?
Why do they say that I don't know what I am talking about?
That in truth I am a fool and a sinner and that
I don't know You at all...

But I know You. You made me. 
And I know that You love me and will forever 
Listen to me whenever I call You, 
Wherever and however my state may be. 

I was made to adore You and sing Your praise... 
You, in Your absolute oneness and beyond comparison 
Of anything known and unknown. 
You in the constancy of affection for me, 
You in Your untroubled ministration of me. 
So if I am to be forever known as a sinner and a weak believer, 
Then I am forever pleased to be known as Your sinner and Your weak believer. 

You, and Your love and mercy is without compare,
Of your doubters why should I ever care? 

Hide me, my Liege! 
From the doubters and from my own recklessness. 
I know there is no limit to Your reach!

Words. We shouldn't need to distinguish our words from our own selves. But sometimes there is a little bridge for us to cross. A little journey for us to undertake. To set sail our soul upon this ego-world full of trials and tribulations. Yet, we should not fear this world at all, but fear instead of falling away from His Love and Pleasure, from His Presence and Ministration.

Our misspoken words often lead us astray, but Muhammad is the Lord's Mercy
to all the worlds - and this includes rescuing the straying sheep. 

But honestly. If we hear a fool, a wretch of of man, a person of dubious appearance talking of God and His Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s.), so we should stay our judgment and permit him to say whatever he wishes. And if what he says is good and sincere, where is the wrong in his conduct? Yes, perhaps he is not the best representation of what a Muslim can be, but honestly, are we?

My Liege Love,
I know You send me 
A little sorrow, a little pain
To make this nightingale sing
His need for You in his
Nightly refrain,
Then You send me
Great joy and unimaginable pleasure
To make this nightingale sing
His cosmic happiness with
Reckless certainty!

The Way of the Prophet is the way of nature, to make humanity  a good
trustee of this world and all of its inhabitants, both seen and unseen.

A Love in Form and Essence. To love Allah(s.w.t.) and His Muhammad Habibullah (s.a.w.s.) sometimes appear to us as a challenge, some great crusade jihad for us to perform. But the truth is Islam, this greatest Gift of Adab (good manners) offered to humanity through the subtle hand of the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.s) is the most natural thing for our soul to accept - Like rain falling, like the ants running up the bark of a tree, like the wind carrying the scent of spring flowers, like the cry of a newborn child, like the first kiss upon your bride's velvet lips... to accept Islam is to accept the embrace of the universe in its zahir (form) and batin (essence).

A universe born upon the Love Eternal between God Most Compassionate and Most Merciful for His Beloved (s.a.w.s.), to whom we all belong.

Have a lovely day, sunshine.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way

Monday, May 6, 2013

My Heart is Not Mine

Careless Heart
I am careless with my heart,
And often I have been scolded
For leaving it all over the place,

I left it in the hands of my departed mother,
I left it in the hands of my living father,
I left it in the hands of my brothers,
I left it in the hands of my friends and strangers,
I have lost my heart so often that I cannot recall
Whether my heart has ever belonged to me at all,

For my heart rose from a golden ocean
And Your winds carried me over the world,
Till the coolness of the high places turned me
Into white water clouds over the land of Man
Until like the rain, my heart fell, 
Again and again...

In love with Love,

In love with You.

It is a stormy wet evening here in Kuala Lumpur. And for me, this weather is perfect for recalling and writing the romance between Man and God Almighty and between Man and the Prophet (s.a.w.s.) - like the blip of a beating heart drawn between Ahad (God) and Ahmad (Prophet of God s.a.w.s.).

Cristina Colombo has let her hearts be stolen and spirited away by all sorts of people and hung on the walls of the strangest and most magical of homes. Though I make no hearts and have only one to give, alas, I too must confess my carelessness, forever losing it to my loving friends and family, to strangers looking for aid, to benefactors showing me mercy and kindness, to the beautiful dawn each morning I awake, and to the sounds of the rain outside, and the thunder high in the stormy sky.

But sky or man, rain or strangers, dogs or a cat named Moses, to whomever or to whatever I lose my heart to, in truth don't we all lose our heart to Him? Allah s.w.t., Creator of Creation, Knower of all things known and unknown, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful unto His creation - ergo, you and me and everyone else in between.

And that God has bestowed upon all humanity, the best of humanity and the best of Creation in the person of Muhammad ibn Abdullah (s.a.w.s) is the ultimate divine assurance of love. And that however you may lose your heart, it is always in the keeping of God Himself. If we would only remember and recall.

So I guess all of our hearts, yours and mine - its not ours really, but belong to the Master of the Universe, Muhammad Prophet of God (s.a.w.s), under the care of the Companions of the Prophet and the Saints assigned unto us, for our guidance, protection and happiness.


Rain makes me soppy this way. But can you really blame me? My heart is not mine, I am sorry.

wa min Allah at-taufiq

Hate has no place in Islam
Love will show the Way